Beware of Toxic Positivity. It is not the Answer

I just wanted to post my thoughts on positivity. I know it can be a little difficult to talk about especially when mental health is all the rage these days. Without any knowledge or support, one can fall prey to something known as toxic positivity. I notice a lot of speeches, posts, and seminars aimed at instilling this toxic "positivity" into lost souls trying to find themselves. I am writing this post to tell that not only is it bullshit, but it also makes you a target for predators looking to take your money and your time.

"Positivity" or whatever that these sharks are trying to sell you, is thinly veiled, dangerous combination of narcissism, solipsism and delusion. Just like the quote below

Just because you think happy thoughts, it doesn't mean that good things will happen nor does it mean that you are entitled to it.

Just because you love yourself, it doesn't mean that you are entitled to love of everyone else.

Just because you feel that you are right, it doesn't mean that everyone else is wrong.

Life exists beyond your delusional fantasies.

These facts seem to disappear only in the mind of an extreme narcissist, but not in the real world. If you want these things, you can't just think that it will happen. Your brain isn't there to create happiness, your brain is there to help you create a plan that leads to happiness. And that plan must be created with a firm understanding of your own limitations and the natural laws and the current social climate in the world. In our minds, we can achieve anything and everything. But in the real world, we are human. We get hurt, we get old, we lose, and we fail. Toxic positivity disconnects its victims from the real world. However, reality will eventually settle in, that is where people become disappointed.

So maybe you aren't making as much money as you would like. Or you are struggling with relationships. Maybe you just aren't as successful as you would like to be. You don't just think up an alternate reality where those problems cease to exist; you come up with a plan, a plan that is realistic and achievable and requires hard work.

Don't think about being a millionaire, set up a plan that increases your income by small amounts and then work your way up there.

Don't think about dating your crushes, go and talk to them and keep developing the relationship.

Don't think about being strong and fit, set up a plan for small incremental gains and work your way up.

Do not let toxic positivity overrule critical thinking and facts. That is what will lead to authentic happiness. It won't be a smooth ride. There will a plenty of bumps along the road, but it will be well worth it.

Thanks for reading!