"as though the "friend" was condescending and not being genuine with her."

Friends who ego trip themselves into thinking that they are more important than your wife and your own feelings deserve no place in your life. I don't want to sound harsh, but good riddence. Your jazz friend and brotherhood friend definitely took your friendship for granted.

I don't want to ever surround myself with those whose pride is more important than being understanding and receptive to the friendship. And although this is impossible to completely avoid, it is good to know that you walked into both scenarios giving benefit of the doubt.

As far as the person who you supported and asked for a favor, I am amazed alone that you even offered something in return. Friendships are not transactional businesses, and for them to give half the vote in moral support shows that the weight of your friendship didn't mean anything to them in the first place.

Sometimes people fall out of touch, but oftentimes it takes a while for true colors to shine, and although all of these situations have built you many pains in the past- two great things I see came of it.

1. The undeniable strength and trust between you and your wife.
2. Friendships work both ways, and although can be started easily, takes years to develop, grow or change.

I actually saw your post yesterday, and got angry myself lol so I wanted to calm down a bit before replying.

Thank you for passing on this lesson! 🌟 ❤