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RE: Homeless Pitiful State

in #life6 years ago

Really like how you've explored the all of the currents and causes that could land someone in what I like to call "houselessness." You've captured the experience of wondering and trying to understand and knowing you could be that person with a few wrong turns.

My one suggestion for this piece would be to consider the use of the phrase "pitiful state." I felt a little jarred each time it was repeated, and it seems like it doesn't provide enough room for dignity in the subject you are considering.

Hope to see more poems from you soon!

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