Parenting Questions: Do you see yourself as a parent? What kind of parent will you be?

in #life7 years ago (edited)

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Have you ever asked yourself what kind of parent are you going to be?

How will you be able to promote and support the physical, intellectual, emotional and social development of your soon-to-be kid?

How will you be able to rear a child when you yourself don't even know if the ways you were brought up are the right ways to support a child to adulthood?

These were some of the questions that popped to my mind and made me bewildered, when I carried my first born. Thankfully, I got through it. The incessant nagging in my mind, if I am doing it right, if I am doing something wrong, what would be the right thing to do in this particular situation, what should I omit, what should I include, etc. made me into a nervous wreck for many months.

Sure, you might tell me to get parenting books, expecting books, and the like, but nothing prepares you for what will actually happen during childbirth. I really wanted a natural birth, because of costs, because of all the fears and pains a C-section will bring. I didn't get to see my daughter for the first time until she was two days old. Yes, she stopped sucking the dropper for the milk because I was not able to move about right away and go to the nursery to visit her. I had a major panic attack in the operating room after the operation and my body was shaking all over it took me a day in the recovery room before I was wheeled in to our ward. There were so many tubes still stuck to me. When we were able to visit her, she eventually tried milk again and I began breastfeeding.

Why I am reminiscing this horrific experience? I think that our first child left special memories in our mind because we did not have an iota of experience and for our second child it was a different experience altogether. Each child, has its own unforgettable moment, but the first one, after all, will always be our first great experience.

You see, when my daughter was born, I felt all the emotional and spiritual roller coaster. My entire life was turned upside down. I felt the most profound sense of love and obligation/responsibility in my life. How could I ever love someone so much, and how that love will continuously grow and grow each day.

Which brings us back to my above questions. My rock-solid professional confidence had been shaken to its core by this little human who couldn't care less for my credentials.

My adventures in parenting had been rough, and full of marks and scars that would make me a warrior in the Survivor island.

And even after all these experiences, I would still be a work-in-progress. I am constantly learning everyday. They changed my world and perspective 360 degrees. Everything in my life has realigned and she and her brother will always take the prime spot. Everything changed and everyday the challenges will still stack up as they grow to leave the nest that we have carefully made for them.

I hope that whenever you decide to raise kids of your own, you will remember that there are no perfect parents and that there are no perfect children, we just strive to create perfect moments in our children's lives.

Goodnight! - @raquelita

(This post is dedicated to all the mothers waiting for another child, and soon-to-be mothers and foster parents.)

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I love this blog! Being a parent is such a bittersweet experience indeed! Kudos to us parents who do extra mile for our kiddos.

Apir @firipinjin, thanks so much. It feels great to have your work appreciated!

I think it is good that you question your capacity as parent because deep down it reflexts ypur longing to be the perfect mother for them. I feel like ypu are doing great as you are aware if your responsibility as a parent. Keep learning forever jd haha. The power of learning is unsurmountable.

By the way, i really like your writing style. It really speaks. At least for me. Lets keep steeming lng miss @raquelita! 😊

Thank you @josejirafa. It feels great to be appreciated. Ako feeling kay crude pa kaayo akong write.ups and I am really struggling with the Markdown Styling Guide. Anyway, I am still doing research on the how-to's kay you know, everyday is a chance to learn new things. Mao na nakanindot diri sa Steemit kay there are a lot of opportunities to learn new things everyday. Keep Steeming!

You know, I'm not sure I see myself as a parent at all. It's not a childish thing; I'm almost 30, and I'm seriously thinking I might not have kids. It felt kind of weird to say that in my family, where a childfree lifestyle isn't exactly embraced or understood.

Listen, it's totally normal. I think our parents might not always get where we're coming from on this. The world has never been stable, but these days, it feels even more uncertain. Personally, having a kid seems like a big responsibility to me. But my friend has been dreaming about having a baby for years, so I'm really excited to get her a subscription to tom to mom boxes, so she can enjoy cute stuff for her and her future baby, like notebooks and albums to save memories. It's all up to you. If you're not feeling ready, like me, then that's totally okay.

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