People have too many expectations from you

in #life6 years ago

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And society too.

Go to school, go to college, get a degree, get a job, get married, buy nice clothes, buy a car, buy a house, have kids, buy even more things you don't need, socialize, have friends, use social media, be aware of everything new, and so on.

Those are expectations people have from you, expectations even society has, and everyone will want to see you do those things. If you don't, you're weird, you have a problem, you're antisocial, you don't want to integrate, and all kind of things they will tell you if you don't do what they want.

They don't deserve your attention.

Did you notice how most people who expect something from you can't do the same thing themselves? A lot of parents out there force their kids to have certain jobs even tho they will never be able to do the same thing and won't even have the courage to try.

Other people will look at your grades and will judge you whenever you don't do well in school, even if most of them are as smart as a stick. Others will look at you and laugh because you don't have your own car or house, even though they bought everything after taking a loan from a bank and now they're in debt for several years.

Everyone will have expectations from you at some point in your life, and there's nothing you can do about it except not giving a crap and focusing on doing your own thing. I'm personally tired of people looking at me like I disappointed them, especially when I didn't even try to impress anyone.

Too much of our time is being wasted trying to impress those we care about, and in too many situations, those we try to impress don't really care, or just don't appreciate your effort.

Focus on doing your own thing, stop giving a crap what others want from you and just ignore everyone who expects you to do something and even blame you for not doing it and focusing too much on yourself.

You're not obligated to make anyone happy, except yourself and if you still do something for a person you care about, at least do it for someone who appreciates it.

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I completely agree that we’re not obligated to make anyone happy.

Also if we’re happier we tend to make the people around us happiness!

Exactly, focusing on your own happiness instead of trying to make others happy usually results in those around you being happy as well.

There is one exception and that is if that somebody is your wife. In that case, making your wife the happiest first makes you the happiest.

Yes, of course, but it also depends on how you focus on those around you.

For example, focusing all your attention on your wife and ignoring yourself completely can bring you to a state of constant anger and sadness and those things, in time, may even influence the relationships you two have.

Everyone should need to find some balance in my opinion, to look after those we care and to do what we can to make them happy, while not ignoring our own happiness.

I do agree, for the most part.

I'm not saying that I'm always putting my wife first. It's just that making her happy makes me happy as well.

Quite true. Though I found that sometimes your family have the best interest for you by expecting some good things for/from you.

True, most of the time parents have good intentions, but in some cases, their good intentions don't really match what you want, and this can create conflict between you and your family, especially when they force you to do something you really like.

For example, if your family constantly tells you not to smoke or drink, even though you like that, then that's good advice. However, if your family forces you to do something you hate in order to have a good life, even if you want to do something completely different, then despite their good intentions, their advice is not necessarily good.

There are people out there who followed their dreams, ignoring their parents and got far, just as there are people out there who listened to the advice of their parents, abandoned their dreams and lived their entire life in regret.

I guess it really depends on each situation, the advice of each parent and what their children want.

As they say - it comes from within - our gifts we share with the world, vibrations we give off.
Yeah, there are people who tend to block highest frequencies but fuck them!

Thanks for the honest writing!
Have a wonderful day!

I agree.

The happiness we share with others often comes in moments when we're happy as well. Focusing on the outside and ignoring what's inside, while in some cases honorable, can lead to more harm done to those we care about, simply because we ignored our state of mind and happiness.

Balance is pretty much a must. Learning how to take care of ourselves, ignoring whatever people around us say, while also not making them feel bad all the time and taking care of people we care about, that is, in my opinion, the best way to handle everything.

Thank you for the kind words :)

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