Agreed on it being a personal thing. In the experiences I've had in life it tends to just boil down to a decision of deciding to move on. Obviously reaching that point can be a pain in the ass at times, and for some it never gets to that point.

Whenever I've gotten closure on any situation it's always me looking at the reality of a situation, actually OBSERVING for once and looking at what is right in front of me. Realizing it's not what I want or it isn't good for me. Deciding to move on and then removing it from my life.

I think the problem is that, in relationships, people hang on to hope that something will change. There is some idea that the person is hanging on to that isn't allowing closure. "He/She will be different, He/She can change, I screwed up, it wasn't his/her fault, etc." which causes a situation to persist and continue. You see it all the time in abusive relationships. The person isn't analyzing what is actually occurring, there is no observation of reality or they break up and one pines for the other for a long time hoping for some change.

There has to be an observation and a realization. I think that's the real closure. A realization of the reality and a decision to move on. That's the simplicity below all of the complexities.

I recently got myself out of a situation by doing that and have been doing much better in life since then. I'm more productive, making more money and i'm happier in my general mood.