The Gift of Safe Space

in #life8 years ago

The thing about the women's group I attended is they feel like a team.

I am thinking about this because @karenb54 commented that the women I ran into after attending their celebration circle a few nights prior seemed very different. I agree! Sandy is a put-together working at home mother. Jennifer is high-spirited witch woman who frolics in the woods and lives a life free of attachments. She does have a son, but he is older and out of the house.

I see myself as somewhere in-between the pair. Yet we all showed up (as did a diverse number of others) to celebrate a single commonality--our gender alignment. I have never been simultaneously so comfortable and uncomfortable.

It is easy to walk into a group of like-minded individuals. We gravitate toward those who reflect our likes, dislikes and life experiences. We make neat little groupings and are loathe to flew or rearrange. The meeting turned that dynamic on its head. There was no cattiness, cliquishness or competition. It was women together with the explicit goal of positive support.

You should try it.

Male or female, it does not matter. Put out an invitation and open up a space for people to enter your life. I suppose it is a bit like church but with instant gratification and no leader.

It was organized thusly: We came together with the express goal of listening and supporting. We were paired together with two other women (one at a time). One spoke and the other listened for a set amount of time. Then we traded roles. There was no advice unless it was sought, no judgment offered. We simply heard each other. It was a practice in holding safe space.

In my youth, I was a basketball player. The team dynamic is one I have always loved, although I never cherished the team vs. team dynamic. I feel I have been invited back into the first without the second.

What I have learned is there need be no boundaries for compassion, with ourselves or others. I was paired with two women randomly who showed up with the intention of listening to me (or whoever coincidence paired them with). They were open hearts. And then I had my turn being the open heart. I saw my pairings transform their stresses to hopes all because they had the gift of a compassionate ear.

I want to practice that daily with special focus on compassion toward myself. It is easy to be present for others, and easier still to ignore my own needs.

I was not expecting this group to enter my life. It is clear to me I need it.

Has anything wonderful unexpectedly shown up in your life? I hope so.

xoxo,

Dani

Images via pixabay.com

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I am glad you have welcomed these lovely ladies into your life, Thanks for the mention :)

I love this post! This is exactly the same type of growth I'm hoping to reach throughout my time on steemit. STEEMIT is something wonderful that entered my life just in the last week!

So excited to read your future posts

That experience sounds extremely cathartic. I want to try that! Or maybe even set something like that up...

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