Hello, Steemians and Steemttes!

Forgive me for I have sinned! Yesterday ended up being quite the awkward day for me. After I wrote yesterdays blog post on the topic of self-help books, I commented a bit here and there searching for interesting content on Steemit. One of my comments got upvoted once, but that upvote was worth more than 1.00$. That never happened to me before, so needless to say I was baffled and amazed. That paired with my reputation keeping on going higher, pay-outs from my first few days rolling in and having surpassed 200 followers did something to me.

It filled me with pride. And pride lead me down a road that made me commit all of the Seven Deadly Sins in one day.

The Sin of Pride!

I have huge respect for people who are rightfully and justifiably proud of themselves and their achievements and know how to let that pride carry them without it weighing on their shoulders. And the reason why I respect that so much is simple: Because I am not one of them. Whenever I feel accomplished, even the slightest bit, I feel the need of wanting to do something small in order to celebrate. Some of you may have read my blog post where I talk about how I make myself actually start doing things. If not, give it a read! It will be worth your while. One thing that I made a common practise ended up starting to break my neck yesterday. This part:

The trick lies in setting very small targets. What you want to set for yourself is actually the very smallest kind of goal or activity you can think of. Almost ignorable in the grand scheme of things. Imagine having a book you really want to or have to read, but 1000 pages are so much, sun is shining and now that you think about it, there is still some cake in the fridge. Another book, left untouched, unloved, unread.

What you want to do isn't setting the goal of having to read that book completely asap. The goal you set will be something small like "I will read the first couple pages". Not many, make it 2-7 and you're good. Reading so few pages is a matter of minutes, seconds if you are a fast reader. And chances are that once you started, you will just stick with it anyway.

Applying this doesn't only work on things that are good for you, no, they can also affect the bad things you should do as I found out when I went out. I decided that treating me to something to eat would be a nice and decent way to celebrate my small accomplishments.

The Sin of Gluttony!

It did not ended up being just a small and decent meal. Oh no, I ended up binging to the point where my stomach hurts even today. Oh, all the things that I have eaten. And only a small amount of that was actually healthy! Quite ridiculous. I had pretty much everything. I plundered a Chinese buffet like a swarm of locusts, on my way home, I bought some spare ribs that I prepared and ate at home, together with some steaks and don't even make me cover the many desserts I had. Anyone who has ever eaten way too much of the wrong stuff knows what will happen right after this.

The Sin of Sloth!

Exactly, nothing happens. As in, you won't be able to do anything for a while. My body was basicly shutting down, being busy to digest the enormous amounts of food I stuffed in my mouth, making me sleepy and lazy for quite a while. I literally got nothing done during this time whatsoever. Not like I could complain about a lack of things to do. At this point, I was actually super frustrated.

The Sin of Wrath!

And oh boy, was I full of wrath. Wrath for myself because this isn't the first time I let something like that happen to me and chances are that it won't be the last. Feeling bad about myself because I should know better and do better but failing myself, especially right now left me so very much frustrated that I am kind of glad that I wasn't alone at the time. Angry people can be very hard to deal with and I am no exception to that. I hardly if ever get as angry as I was yesterday, thankfully so.

The Sin of Envy!

This is where things really took a turn for the ugly. The source of all of this happening, the pride, turned itself around and came crushing down on me. I felt envious for the people that were able to be on this platform and were able to transform and shape their lives for the better way earlier than I have the opportunity now. Envy is an ugly beast and I really was unhappy with how I felt about this topic. In fact, I don't feel comfortable talking about it in the first place, but I think that it is necessary. And it's not the end of all the bad, it only gets worse.

The Sin of Greed!

Greed and Envy are quite close together I find. With the Envy came also the urge of just wanting more things. Remember, this comes after having had some form of personal success and having gorged myself on enough food that could have been enough to feed a small family by itself. Yet, Envy let to greed and I found myself wanting to get more of steemit, more of life, more of everything.

The Sin of Lust!

This is actually the weakest part of my whole conundrum. I also think that envy, greed and lust can be quite close to one another, especially if you don't take lust in it's most literal way. It was actually quite the opposite of lust that I experienced. When I was finally able to move myself again, I looked into the mirror and was quite disgusted with myself. The day started off good and strong and I ended up perverting all the good I had done so far in one fell swoop. Not only regarding my efforts here on steemit but also efforts like taking better care of myself and my health or using money in a more responsible fashion.

A Silver Lining?

Today is a new day and while my stomach is still aching from all the bad food I have ingested, my mind feels relatively clear now. I can look at yesterday with a distanced and calm view now and can evaluate and judge what happened to me yesterday much better.

About that, I will tell you more about in my next post which I will publish in a couple of hours. I am looking forward to you reading it and think that you will find it quite insightful. Until then, I hope that you enjoyed this post of mine and will see you in the next one.

Thank you all for your loyalty and support!