Inability to Say "No"

Experiencing an overwhelming sense of laziness can be caused by burnout, which can be brought about by being overwhelmed with too many things to do and obligations to fulfill. In turn, being regularly overwhelmed with too much to do is usually caused by always saying, "yes" to other people's requests for help.

Ironically, being too industrious in helping others can be a reason to feel lazy. I'm not advocating that you say "no" to everybody who asks you for help or favor all the time. No, what I'm saying is you must learn to say "no" most of the time and only say "yes" when needed or appropriate. Why? If "yes" is your rule and "no" is the exception, you will frequently feel overwhelmed with too much to do. And when you feel that way often, laziness isn't far behind.

Why do people find it hard to say "no" to others even if they already have their hands full? There are several reasons. One is the need to be accepted and wanted by people. Some people think that by saying "no" people will no longer ask favors from them and, as a result, they will no longer be wanted, liked or accepted.

Another reason is out of habit. Maybe they grew up in a family culture that taught how bad it is to turn down other people's requests for assistance or help. As an adult, those practices stuck as automatic habits. And as habits, no thought is ever given to it - it's just done. So how can you learn to say "no" more often to people and say "yes" less? First is to learn to love and accept yourself. If you always say "yes" to others out of fear of being rejected or no longer wanted later on, it's a sign that you yourself don't think you're worthy of being accepted and loved for who you really are.

Second thing you can do to say "no" more often than "yes" is to reflect on and identify what's really most important to you. When you know those things and are always aware of them, you will always be able to correctly assess whether or not saying "yes" to other people's requests for help or assistance is going to be worth it or not. Believe me when I say that most of the time, many people's requests for help or assistance aren't in line with your deepest held values and as such, you'll be able to say "no" more frequently and much easier. Say "yes" only to those that will help you support your deepest held values.