I survived clinical depression!

For the first time, I will be disclosing one thing about me that I may have shared to few friends but was really hesitant to share publicly. It is none other than my journey towards overcoming depression!

College life was one hell of a roller coaster ride. Having to deal with academics, a little culture shock and some personal issues all through out puberty, made me the person I almost cannot recognize. But you know what was the best and favorite mask of a depressed person? An over-acting, overly-joyed face! I managed to put on that mask for so long that I almost forgot what it felt like to have it removed.

Look, that photo above was taken in the morning when I lost my laptop, cellphone, camera and Php15,000 cash to a thief who is still on the loose. This happened last year, some time in June. I was in Manila, Philippines when all that happened. I had no relatives living with me there. I was there for work and I lost almost everything I had.

After graduation, I thought things will be in much better condition. But I was wrong! Being an adult was way more difficult than I had ever expected! The pressure at work, the peer pressure and the never-ending bills almost snapped my sanity. All of it seemed to be too much. The burden was too heavy for me to carry so one day I decided to see a specialist!

I was having second thoughts but I still went. I had a very nice conversation with the Psychiatrist and she told me we'll have weekly sessions. She handed me some anti-Psychotic drugs but they were more of sleeping pills. After a few visits, I managed to tell Doc Sally what's bothering my mind. She told me I'm experiencing manic episodes and thank God they were not so severe but still alarming. She constantly told me about the Gospel and that was of a great help. She also told me to read some books. I continued with the therapy until I felt better and I felt everything was manageable. This year, when I went back to Cebu, I attended worships and cried my heart out. There is nothing better than the cure God can give His children and I am so blessed to be one of the recipients of that medicine of love and salvation.

That journey had proven me that there is no impossible thing if you surrender it to God and if you trust His grace that He is indeed working miracles in you. Also, believe in yourself that you can overcome it and you will. You will then be surprised how powerful our mind is and most importantly, how amazing God is.

I may still have some anxiety attacks but they are all manageable. I hope any one of you who might be experiencing the same to stay strong and to never forget to pray! Talk to someone whom you are comfortable with. And you, if you have that friend who seem to be troubled, listen! You might save a soul for lending an ear.

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This has been @nikkabomb saying, "If more of us learn how to listen by the heart, it will surely lessen suicide rates!"

Nikka Ganzan, the author

_{I was destined to be a successful civil engineer but my heart belongs to literature. And if I have learnt something from the past years of struggles, it is maybe this - "Sometimes a leap of faith is what you need in order to find happiness. Because if you are not to become a happy person, then what's the purpose of life then?".}

_{I tried working in an industry with the use of my maximum skills in my chosen field and I was earning big (bigger than what I expected), yet I was not happy. In between those times, I found deeper and stronger interest in my first and second love - writing and photography.}

_{And so here I am, in my little corner in the blockchain. I hope you had a good read and check out more here ---> @nikkabomb. Lovelots.}