Thanks for sharing this with us! Remember to have people in your daily waking life you can vocalize these thoughts to as well! Have you ever heard of the pharamakon? Writing down is a good way to organize, but it's important to EXPRESS as well! So much feeling can be lost through text only communication.

On your note about instant gratification, remember that having little victories in the day is important too!

Don't give in to worry, you don't have to have everything planned out for things to work out, and even if you did it wouldn't be much fun that way!

Love and aspire to inspire!

Peace.