Continuing To Parent Through The Pilgrimage Pilgrimage
The pilgrimage of grave, nyekar or nyadran, is a tradition that is still on guard to this day. Before Ramadan and Idul Fitri, usually children visit the parents who have been buried. They sat on the sidelines of the sara to ask forgiveness of loved ones who have now been in barzah.
Some people view this tradition as unnecessary, in their opinion, to pray for the body can be done anywhere, not to the grave pilgrimage. There is another view of the pilgrimage tradition is a futile behavior, because praying for parents should be done every day without the need to visit his tomb. After all those who have died will not know that their children and grandchildren visit him at the tomb. Is that right?
Besides to remember the afterlife, the grave pilgrimage, especially the pilgrimage to the tomb of the parents and pray for it, has value in Islam. As the hadith of the Prophet SAW: "Whoever is the pilgrimage to the grave of his parents every Friday, Allah will certainly forgive his sins and record them as proof of his devotion to the parents." (HR Abu Hurairah Ra)
While the assumption that my pilgrim bur is not beneficial to the corpse, it is said through the hadith of Rasullah SAW: "No one visits his brother's grave and sits to him (to pray for him) unless he is happy and accompanies him until he stands leaving the grave." (Narrated by Ibn Abi ad-Dunya of Aisha Ra.)
There is a reciprocal benefit in doing pilgrimage to the grave of the parents. On the one hand, parents who have not been able to feel happiness with the presence of beloved children in his grave, on the other hand, children can continue his devotion to parents just by doing the pilgrimage of the grave and pray for him.
However, the general grave conditions that exist today, do not consider the importance of the grave pilgrimage by ignoring the comfort and safety of pilgrims. Tombs coincide, there is no way or shaf that provides the distance between the tombs with each other, so that the tomb is often occupied and stepped on by the pilgrims who want to pray another tomb. The narrow distance between the tombs made the pilgrims uncomfortable especially when the funeral was crowded by pilgrims.