Challenging the old narratives
There are always some customs in the society which are considered to be unalterable and holy. Anyone challenging these customs is labeled as a heretic. For example, in our society, a woman is supposed not to marry again with another man after she is divorced or her husband is dead. This tradition has no roots in our religion nor in the morality but it has become a norm and most of the people practice it and anyone ignoring it has to face the taunts of the society.
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Similarly, if a man establishes a relationship with a woman, he mostly boasts about it but if the society comes to know that a particular woman is having a relationship, she is considered to be a shame on the family and tribe. There are many other such old narratives which need to be challenged and changed but the task is not easy since people have practiced it for decades and even centuries.
Now let me give you an example from the West. I have heard a lot in the news about the young people in the West going on a killing spree because they don’t have Girlfriends/Boyfriends. The proud feeling of others around makes that particular person suffer from inferiority complex and ultimately he/she wants to finish people around him and even himself.
These traditions and norms need to be changed but one thing must be kept in mind that change starts from within oneself.
That is very sad that a culture would expect a woman to remain miserable after her husband dies. Perhaps the expectation is this is meant as a "romantic" courtesy to their lost spouse. More likely the men in the culture believe a woman has lost her purity after she marries, which is an unfair rule that only applies against women. Even women will shame other women for breaking this taboo, because they compete to have their sisters and daughters who are pure to be seen as more desirable. "Til Death Do Us Part" is the vow, but not many people follow it to the letter. Either they take it too far, or they break their vow.
Never heard of the killing sprees you describe in the West as being a result of loneliness. I have heard of people doing some very violent actions against their spouse or loved one because they got dumped or cheated on them. It tends to make some people become very crazy if they feel like they got totally blindsided, fooled, or unfairly taken advantage of.
The more immature and emotionally unstable they are, the more likely they will have a backwards sense of revenge justice, and might take violent measures into their own hands. This can happen in any culture.
Exactly, sir. The tribalism has many problems. The laws only apply to females in tribal societies. I have heard on TV about the killing spree. Don't know how much reality in it.
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