10 Years...Gone but Never Forgotten

Since 2009, January has been kind of a tough month for our little group of friends and family. We lost two of our very good friends...two days in a row in January 2009. Ten years ago...an entire decade....

I'm being a bit selfish and kind of writing this entry for myself as I dig back through old photos. (But you're welcome to continue reading if I haven't lost you yet) ;)

To this day, I've never found the "correct" mode of grieving, so I just like to look back on old photos to reminisce and enjoy the good times that we were able to share with those that are no longer with us.

They were sons. They were brothers. They were uncles. They were cousins. I can't begin to imagine how their deaths affected their families, but they were our friends. Their deaths affected us too.

In January 2009, one of our best friends, Tim, was killed in an automobile accident. In this photo, he can be seen in the corner playing drums. Our other dearly departed friend is in the same photo by the window, grinning and sipping a drink . As if Tim's accident wasn't one of the most devastating things that could ever happen, we woke up the very next day to find that our other good friend, Kenny, had died from cardiac arrest in the middle of the night.

We were young. We were naive. We thought we were invincible.

How wrong we were. Death is inevitable, however untimely. And death does not discriminate.

But as I mentioned, I never learned to cope with their deaths as I felt I should have. I've always had to be the "strong" one when unfortunate events occurred, so I'm not much of a "crier". I always find myself looking back through old photos. And I always find myself laughing or smiling. (I know, I know...How inappropriate) ;) But it's my coping method. This is what I have left of them.

And while old photos may be few and far between, I am so thankful that we were able to freeze a few moments in time with these guys. So now, I'll focus on the good memories.

I met Tim through friends of friends, and eventually we ended up playing in a band together. We bonded instantly. We were always goofing around.

Some of my favorite memories with Tim were driving through a cow field in his Blazer with SLAYER blasting out the windows. Lighting off roman candles in the middle of the road when a car might have come through...Hitting golf balls off of the roof...

Tim was outgoing, silly, loud at times, and openly affectionate.

Then there was Kenny....

Kenny was a man of few words, but there was no doubt that he loved his family and friends more than anything in the world! Besides fishing...Kenny loved to go fishing and that's how he and Jason became such good buds. Ten years ago, Jason could sleep all day. I'm talking about a full 24 hours. Kenny would call him and leave messages on our answering machine saying, "Jason!!! Wake up man. It's a beautiful day and we need to go fishing!" And Jason would wake up and go fishing.

This was back before camera phones were common. They took this photo on a hike with a "point-and-shoot" little camera. And I''m SO glad that they paused for a photo

In closing, I would just like to remind you to say "I love you" to people that mean something to you. Tim never said it. He always punched me in the arm and said, "See ya later, buddy!"

Kenny never said it. He just said, "Hey, it's gonna be nice out tomorrow. Let's go fishing."

Just be sure to let people know that you love them, one way or another. "I love you" comes in many different forms. You never know when the unthinkable might happen. Let's be kind to one another. Let's appreciate one another. Just ...be nice.