My husband is mad that I let the cat out of the bag... he says I "ruined Christmas" but like you, I too felt bad about lying to this little kid(6 yo) who has to depending on us to be honest and reliable adults. LOL. So I told her the truth, then a year or two later I ask: "Are you mad at me for telling you about Santa being Daddy?" She replies matter of factly: "No, I never believed in Santa." Then this morning she tell me that she doesn't want presents next year.

I was kind of beaming with pride. can't exactly explain why though.

you are not alone ;)