This is Thailand. Chapter 7: 27-year-old professor. Part 8.

The end of semester arrived quicker than I expected and before I knew it, the exam season had come around. Everything was organised formally and officially. For every one exam, there were two or three teachers. Their role was to check twice the identity of the students showing up at the exam – once when they enter the room and once when they sign the attendance list.

Link to the previous post: This is Thailand. Chapter 7: 27-year-old professor. Part 7

The exam papers were in the sealed envelope, which were opened upon being signed by all of the teachers present at the exam. If any student was found to be cheating, a complicated procedure was supposed to be launched. It consisted of kicking the cheater out of the exam hall and filling out a lengthy report about their character. The whole procedure was so thoroughly thought through that it was hard to imagine anyone actually going ahead with it.

I didn’t know the teachers present in the room because no professor is allowed to work with their own group. Because we didn’t know each other, everybody appeared to be very stiff and followed the rules in a no less orthodox way than radical Islamists sticking to their religion. The exams lasted for two weeks, where I spent the whole time walking the room, checking if students were cheating by looking over their shoulders. I walked aimlessly for three hours at a time, stressing some of them so much that some almost fainted. This wasn’t one of the more fascinating or pleasant aspects of the teacher’s career.

I received the exam papers of my group. Almost 200 in total. Piam eagerly helped me because she had always wanted to know what it felt like to be a teacher. I gave her test sections which she could easily compare against an answer sheet. I checked essays and open questions and was terrified after reading just a few. Could it be true that they really haven’t learned anything in the last three months?

Piam had a suspicious facial expression. I knew this meant that she was up to something.
-Honey, what are you doing? - I asked.
-Meee? - she replied cheekily – Nothing.
-I know that face. Tell me.
-Well, I’m helping them a bit.
-How do you mean ‘helping’?
-Well, I might be giving them the right answer.
-You can’t do that!
-But they aren’t doing very well and I feel sorry for them.
-That’s because they haven’t studied enough.
-Alright. I’ll stop now. Promise.
-Half of them will fail anyway.

I wasn’t too far from the truth. If I had followed the rules, I would had to have failed 40% of my Advanced English Composition group and 50-60% of my English 1 students. The final results were terrible. The final exam was only worth 50% of the total mark. The students would also sit a midterm exam which was very easy and the results were always better. Students spent 10 hours in the Language Center, watching movies and playing “educational” games. How to help students who lose points because they are too lazy to attend class or don’t wear the correct uniform? How to help lazy kids who think they can get away with what they want? I decided to share my thoughts with Guy.

-Guy, I’ve checked the exams. It seems that I’ll have to fail 40-60% of the students. What do you think?
-A lot. Too many. Why?
-That’s when I apply the criteria. They don’t seem to care.
-Still too many. Work on that. - Then added, with a smile - TIT!*, my friend. Everything is possible here leaving me in no doubt for what I had to do.
-Thanks Guy.
-My pleasure. And remember that in Thailand you have to think and behave like locals. If you try to apply Western logic here, sooner or later you will end up in a mental hospital or shoot yourself in the head.
-I see. Or at least I think so.

I chose a few students in each group who got the lowest marks. I observed the other criteria. If they attended the class, wore the uniform and matched all the other requirements, but fucked up the final exam, they were saved. If I saw that they didn’t care throughout the whole semester and failed the exam – they were in deep shit. I failed two to four students in each group, which was 5 to 10%. The luckier ones managed to save points by being more active in the classroom, making attempts at home work and occasionally making additional classes. Was it fair? Of course not. But what was I supposed to do? This is Thailand...

TO BE CONTINUED...

*“TIT” is a popular saying among foreigners in Thailand. It is an abbreviation of This Is Thailand. It’s used when something doesn’t make sense to someone from the West. It signals that further conversation about the topic is pointless. Illegal prostitution on every corner where the police is guarding it as security? TIT! The necessity of giving lots of jewellery to your wife's to prove that you can afford to look after her? TIT! Changing your students’ scores so that they can pass? TIT!

The image used is not mine. CC0 Public Domain. Free for personal and commercial use. Even though no attribution is required I think it's worth mentioning I've found it here.