Is porn ruining your sex life? Let's talk about some emotional barriers
Emotional barriers are unconscious walls that people put between themselves and other people. The thing about porn is that it’s easy and convenient to watch because you don’t have to be involved with another person emotionally. This might resonate with some of you who initially struggled with intimacy and relationships but found porn as a way to escape from having to deal with strong emotional barriers.
After time though, the excitement and the pleasure wears off and you find yourself feeling guilty or sad even but, because you are addicted, like any drug, you find it hard to stop. And each time you watch porn you are falling deeper and deeper into the hole and further and further away from the people you care about.
One key aspect to quitting porn is to find out what emotional barriers you had before you started watching porn and what emotional barriers you carry with you now. Once you break through those barriers, it will be easier for you be intimate and your communication skills will be much stronger.
Some common emotional barriers include depression, anxiety, anger, fear, and even pride. We’ll talk more about mental health later in the book but for this chapter I want you to start thinking what kind of emotional barriers may be haunting you. Once you recognize the barriers you can then start to figure out how to break through them. If the barriers are mental health related then making an appointment with a professional would be a good start. If the barriers come from past experiences then perhaps revisiting those situations to make amends with what happened and start living life in the present moment.
You’ve probably seen this quote online as I’ve seen it on a bunch of memes but it’s so true. Your past does not define you. It’s important to observe and pinpoint such barriers because it’s the only way to dig deeper into your consciousness as a way to heal and get rid of the emotional baggage you have been holding on to for all this time.
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