Respect in a relationship is bidirectional

@travelista commented on one of my earlier posts today with a request for a topic on 'respect in relationships.' So at her request I'm going to create one. You guys are my readers and without you I wouldn't exist. That goes for any other regular readers. Always up for suggestions!

Respect in a relationship is a tough one. It's about both parties and it's about leading by example. I only learned to properly respect my wife through finally learning to respect myself as a person. That, and through guidance from her.

You see I was never really respectful as a younger male. How could I be when no-one had taught me to properly respect anything.

My clothes, grew tatty and unkempt,

My belongings were frequently lost or smashed

Sometimes they were stolen, and I'd think,

"Pah, I'll get a new one"

The women I dated were used for sex and thrown away as one does a condom, and the women I was interested in never stuck around for long, in part, because of my lack of respect,

Then one fateful day I met a beautiful lady, absolutely stunning she was,

She knew I'd have done anything for her, and I still would,

But she was super smart as well as super attractive, and used that to train me in ways I couldn't imagine,

She taught me how to take care of my belongings,

She taught me what it felt like to dress super smart, and keep everything clean and tidy,

She kicked me to the dentists, and the doctors, and chiropodists, and wherever I needed to go to properly take care of myself,

It wasn't long before I began to actually enjoy being me, and soon after that, love being me,

But all that had changed because "I wanted to make a difference and change in my life" and wasn't scared to take a leap into the unknown

Best quote:

"To succeed you gotta jump off that cliff of the unknown"

And then from there I started to learn other quirky things like:

Use the internet as if your partner was looking over your shoulder, if you do or write something that you feel would upset them then you shouldn't be doing it, period.

What I see as stupid may not necessarily be stupid to my partner, and I need to respect that. A relationship is a meeting in the middle of two people, not one doing as they please and minimising the needs of the other.

She hates the toilet seat being left up. I see that argument as stupid, but to live together as a couple I need to respect that it upsets her and try to keep it down. Just as she respects my needs.

I learned to open up, just as she does with me. Your partner needs to have your back; to be truly vulnerable is knowing that your partner can destroy you with the knowledge they have but chooses not to, to nourish that upset and to heal those wounds.

Respect in a relationship is a co-joining of two people meeting in the middle, celebrating each others awesomeness and propping up those weaknesses.

I was lucky in the aspect that my wife had super respect for herself when we first met, and in turn she helped me respect myself, and through respecting myself I learned to respect her.

Be awesome, friends.

I hope that's what you were looking for @travelista :)