Lost a Good Friend In Iraq and Had A Daughter Born On The 4th of July
I will never forget the day Sgt. Michael Barkey died. We were heading West on Highway 1 and I couldn't wait to get back to base. We were the second of two convoys out on a mission for our company that day. The nights always get so cold in Iraq and manning an M2 on the back of a 5 ton(M923) going 55 miles an hour doesn't help the battle of trying to stay warm.
We were on a night mission and it was just beginning to get daylight outside. I don't remember hearing anything on the radio. I just remember coming upon a 5 ton in the road and it was mangled. I then looked at the truck identifier and realized it was one of ours. I will never forget that sinking feeling. You just knew it was bad. Even all these years later I can't verbally describe that scene. It's burnt into my mind like a tattoo of an old girlfriend's name you want to have removed.
The whole drive back to base was silence. It was the longest ride I have ever taken. We still had an approximate two hour drive to get around Lake Habbaniyah and get to Al Taqaddum. After we unloaded our trucks is when they broke the news to us. Sgt. Barkey had died from a sniper shot to the truck tire which caused the truck to lose control. He was ejected as he was a gunner standing in the back of the truck.
He was honored by our company that day.I remember it was still morning. The Fallen Soldier Cross with his boots, rifle, and helmet is the first thing I think of when hearing taps. I am the guy at the Memorial Day ceremony with tears spewing down my face during the taps ceremony. I can't even hear it in a movie without tearing up.
A few years ago I came across an article in the Akron Beacon Journal in regards to the Barkey Family. As if his family hadn't been through enough losing one son to war... his brother had a really tough time dealing with Mike's death and committed suicide. He mentioned in his last letter “I know what it was like losing Mike and it is something I could never learn to live with.” Essentially the family lost two sons due to a war. It's truly heartbreaking.
When I am having a tough day dealing with Iraq I try to think of the Barkey Family. This was their son and brother. The heartache I feel has to be minute compared to what they feel. It's hard to not miss such a great person though. He had a smile that would light up a room, his mood was always jovial, and he was SO LOUD! If you were around him he probably had you doubled over in laughter from a quirky comment, a funny dance, or just some off the wall look. He was truly full of life. He wasn't afraid to work either. But man he would have fun doing it.
There is never a day that goes by I don't think of Barkey. I have a personal experience in my life that lets me know he is smiling from somewhere. Seven years after Sgt. Barkey died I was told my daughter would be due in July. She ended up being born on July 4th. Sgt. Barkey died on July 7th.
What are the odds a war vet has a daughter born on the Fourth of July and so close to Barkey's death? She's loud, witty, and loves to sing. Oh she loves to sing. It's like there is a piece of Barkey's personality in her. I brought up the anomaly to my wife before the birth of our daughter and asked her to name our child in honor of the life she represents.
My wife honored my request by giving her the name Lily Dawn. Pure Daybreak is the technical meaning of her name. A dawn to me is a new beginning because it's a new day. I've always taken her name to mean "pure new beginning". It's very fitting for the life I believe she has been put on this earth to represent.
Thank you for allowing me to share my story and life with you.
All Funds generated from this post will be donated to American Gold Star Mothers in honor of the Barkey Family sacrifice for our country
Photo Credit: Staff Sgt. Nicole Dykstra. Labeled for reuse, via Google Images
I'm sorry for your loss, thank you for serving and finding a way to deal with your grief that is positive. Children are a blessing🙏
Thank you. Yes, I truly believe my wife and two children are the ones who have allowed me to come this far. My wife due to her unconditional love for me and the motivation my children give me to strive to be a better person.
Your story made me cry, sharing one's grief can help others as well. Your story touched the loss I've had to work through in my life. We can't live our lives without losing loved ones. Big love to all our families that support us through the darkness and the light!