To my Love

in life •  last year 

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I can't wait more. It have been around a year. And this thing is tearing me from inside from the day I fell in love with You. It was the second time I saw you.

The first time, probably you won't remember,

I saw you in hospital, you were going for clinicals I suppose. You were standing outside the doctor's lift. The moment I saw you I got stoned. I thought it was mere attraction,but fortunately or unfortunately it was not attraction. I was in love with you but couldn't realise.

I had to go somewhere on the same floor. I asked you the location. You guessed it but,wrongly. After searching I found the correct location, but I was completely lost in you. My eyes were just searching for you like a lost sailor searching for shore in vast sea.

I was confused about what should I do. I wished I was a bit older or you were a bit younger.

After the second time, my all nights just went thinking only of you. I know you are a bit older I don't know how much, maybe 21 or 22 max. But the thing is My heart always lead my brain. Heart doesn't care about age. How much older or how much younger the other person is. It just happens.

For the past one year my life have become a burden just of thinking how to speak to you. I see you every morning, but still I cannot say anything or do something. It's like my both hands are tied. Or I am like a Warrior who is left in the battlefield without any weapon. I feel like a boat who is drowning in the infinite deapth of the sea or like a person who have jumped from the edge of cloud without a parachute. I can't do anything. I am so much filled with emotions and love for you that I can't find any way to take them out. I feel ultimate restlessness when I see you with anyone else.

See, try to understand, I know I am being really stupid, but I am too much in love now, I can't turn my back. I don't have any other choice but to tell you now because I can't live more like this. I just want to be with you talk to you all the time, I just want to forget about everything, and focus on you. I can't think about and don't care about consequences.

What could be the WORST? You'll say No. What more can happen beyond this. You won't believe I don't remember your voice but I can hear you. I just want to spend my each and every second with you.

I know it's difficult, but if you say Yes, I'll be the happiest person of all, My countless sleepless nights will be filled with joy. I can't even write how enlighten I will be. I can feel it write now.

Don't think I didn't try. I tried to deviate my mind from you, but my heart is still with you. A person can live without mind, but what should i do if my heart wants you so badly. It's not my fault.

But if you say No. I just want to say that I understand. I know I'll be unstable for many days. I feel like crying now, just to write that you'll say No. I know it will be hard. But I'll manage, I have my pen and paper. I'll write. But after rejection, I'll still have hope because I know my love is true. I'll have the Will of getting you. Because where's there is Will there is Way. I want to walk on that way which will lead me towards you.

Sometimes, I become Happy without a reason just by closing my eyes and thinking about you. I don't know when you did that Magic, but I love you for sure. No attraction last for a year. I am definitely in love.

Just stand in my shoes, imagine how frustrating it is for me.......

*You are most beautiful gorgeous and like I can't compare you with anything. You are amazing.

*I'll Wait for your Reply.

-Raahi

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