We're as old as the sum of our fears
Waking up this morning, trying to check the time on my phone I saw a breaking news alert about the earthquake in Mexico. Instantly, my brain translated this: Mexico, quake, very bad. (And I was wide awake!)
It was only after reading the news that I understood that sudden feeling of panic.
Even without me being aware of it, my brain had somewhere in storage the tragedy of the quake that struck Mexico in 1985. Why would I have such a strong feeling about something that happened long ago, half a world away? Easy, the quake of 1985 made a strong impression on me because it was a few years after a devastating earthquake in my own country. I was a child at the time and didn't understand much, but what endures is the feeling of panic and helplessness.
It is an acquired fear that will stay with me for the rest of my life. The slightest tremor gets my heart racing and any news of a devastating earthquake immediately gets my attention because I can relate to it.
What is a hurricane?
Many people today are more interested in the news about Hurricane Irma. I am, too. I read a few stories, I know the facts, but I cannot say I have any real feelings, because it is something I cannot relate to. It is not a fear that I know, therefore I cannot feel it. I can only imagine it.
The case of the horrible winter coat
Another fear we learn over time is poverty and I'm not thinking about extreme poverty, just becoming poorer, having less money, not being able to afford some stuff. I don't think people born rich can ever understand this, but regular folks living normal lives, having been through bad times will always have this fear buried deep inside.
I was made aware of this fear that I have just this morning, when my daughter took a suitcase out of storage and neatly folded inside she found the horrible winter coat. It is a brown hideous thing that I haven't worn in 20 years, but I know it's long and warm and I hang on to it because one day I might needed it. Of course, I have several different winter coats, but deep down there's this fear that one day a terrible winter might come and maybe I won't afford a good coat. To be sure, I also have some equally horrible boots somewhere that I don't ever wear, but they might go well with the coat.
Lessons learned the hard way
I'm often annoyed with my mother, as, like many old people, she tends to hoard food. As she lives on her own there's little I can do about it, but worry she might eat food that is well out-of-date and get sick. There is no real need for her to do so as she has the means to live a decent life to the end of her days. But she's seen more than me in her life and knows that nothing we take for granted is actually...granted. The way I see it, having a pension and some savings should be enough, but then she's lived through a communist takeover of the country and private property being abolished. Not a lesson one can forget, I guess.
It is a fear that I don't have (yet!), but who knows how I'll behave when I get to be her age.
There's still time to learn new fears!
What about you? What are your deepest fears?
This post has received a Bellyrub and 1.77 % upvote from @bellyrub thanks to: @kid4life. Send SBD to @bellyrub with a post link in the memo field to bid on the next vote, every 2.4 hours. Be sure to vote for my Pops, @zeartul, as Steem Witness Hope you enjoyed your bellyrub!
Thank you!
War. It was just a small glimpse. But i guess since I was a child, it left a harder imprint. My grandmother took me to the basement. I remember we were filling the water to take with us. And then we sat in the basement (and a few other people) and waited. I hate the planes or chopper sounds cuz of it.