Thank you so much to those that have replied to this post. Each of you have been so thoughtful and uplifting, and I appreciate it immensely. This post was the first time I have really put many of my thoughts out of my brain. It is most likely my longest post, but also the easiest one to write once I had started. I have learnt a lesson that there are people who are interested in what I have to say - when it is meaningful and unfiltered.