What do MEN take off at the end of the day?

in life •  2 years ago


As I stood in the shower this evening and internally repeated a conversation I had with my partner earlier this morning, I started thinking about all the trouble and effort that women go through on a daily basis…

To fill you in briefly on the conversation… the man in my life is a DJ, so he mostly works nights and sleeps the mornings and sometimes the days away. In addition to this, he is probably one of the most easy going “min ge spin” people I have ever met. (it’s an Afrikaans, South African term for: not phased about anything)

It is amusing that we are actually in a relationship, because I am an exceptionally fast paced, high energy individual and David moves at, what I like to refer to as “a glacial pace” haha ;) Nonetheless, he had a networking meeting to attend today so he had to wake up at sparrows – like the rest of us normal folk… and he made a chirp whilst looking outside the window saying “oh, so this is what the morning looks like” – I laughed and continued my morning routine…


In the re-living of this conversation during my shower, I started thinking about all the CRAP (because it is crap really, isn’t it) that I put myself through everyday… and for what?!


Let’s take a look at this shall we…

Guys get up, shower, throw on any one of many monotonous looking pairs of pants and any of their shirts that happen to be hanging in their wardrobe… and let’s be honest, the decision making process for that probably revolves around “ironed or not ironed.” Lol

Other than the usual rubbish that we all have to do, like brushing our teeth, and sticking on a little deo, that’s it! They are done! – And they are perfectly happy with being done like “that”! And for the most part - they look GOOD!


What the bloody hell are we doing wrong ladies? Lol

There is a saying… “KISS” – Keep It Simple Stupid” and I don’t think us ladies will EVER grasp it! Lol

On an average day (which happens few and far between), I will grab my “go to’s” in the wardrobe and off I go, but the reality is, I am NEVER happy with myself afterward! I feel like Sh*t and as I go through the day and I see other women prancing around in their fabulous little outfits, it makes me feel even bloody worse - regretting my lack of effort earlier that day... Lol!


And this is why; those occasions are few and far between…hahaha! True Story!

On most days, (if I haven’t picked out my outfit the night before), I will wake up… VERY GRADUALLY... if at all possible, check the weather, and then contemplate what to wear over a cup of coffee… Then, its shower time - which apart from body washing - consists of shaving, washing hair, exfoliating and a whole lot more. Lol… (And yet, amazingly enough - in that department, we STILL finish quicker than guys, who simply stand still under the water for their full 27 minute quota) hehehehe! FACT!


Then it’s time to get dressed, and the “so called outfit” that you had visualised in your mind, suddenly doesn’t work in practice, so its changed, and then perhaps changed again…. And for me, this is all done in-between waking my son up, making hot chocolate, breakfast, packing his school bag and setting out the school uniform etc.

Ok, so the outfit is sorted, all generally consisting of bra, heels, tops that are too tight, pants that give your g-string a headache and many other unspoken factors. Haha!

And let’s not even get on to the make-up routine (OR LETS DO LOL)… Or even worse, selecting the perfect accessories…. Hehehe!


First its moisturizer, then pore refiner, then foundation, then powder and then eye shadow which essentially consists of 5764 different shades of the same colour. Then its eyeliner which requires a SERIOUS amount of skill if you don't want to walk out the door looking like a panda bear! Once you have managed to get that right, its blush, bronzer and then mascara – and after all that, you still need to go back to the mirror to clean up the blobs and smudges of eyeliner, mascara and eye shadow that have seemingly attached themselves to every OTHER part of your face other than the ones they were originally intended for.

– The struggle is REAL!!!!!

What the BL**DY HELL ladies?! hehe

Don’t get me wrong! I love it all!! I always walk out the door feeling like a million bucks… PLUS SOME! And I love the inner confidence that it brings with it…


But I cannot deny… that at the end of the day… When I come home and take those mouth-watering stilettos off, or even better… lose the BRA… and make-up… It is THE BEST FEELING EVER!!!! Hahaha!! No, REALLY!

Women spend SO much time on their appearance; I cannot help but beg the question… WHY?!

Well, yes, in many ways – I suppose it is pointless and a waste of time… but it is almost as if we are hard-wired that way. And no, this is not a new thing. It has ALWAYS been this way. Women have forever been the creatures of “beauty, mystery, grace and elegance”.

Is it a primal thing?

Because, let’s be honest… men are visual creatures. and men and women are designed to integrate.


Is it inherent in women to beautify themselves to please their male counterparts? Do we do it for ourselves? Do we do it because we want validation? Or do we do it simply because it feels good?

Irrelevant really, because no matter how good it feels to take off that bra and shoes at the end of the day – we will do it all again the next day… and we will love it!

In fact, the satisfaction of losing it all at the end of the day is reward enough for the effort…


So I have to ask… what do men take off at the end of the day that offers them the same reward? Hehehe

… and go!

(Keep it clean folks! Haha)

Until next time...

Much love from Cape Town xxx

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Love this post Jaynie and plan to include it in upvotable 12! While we often say men are visual, really it goes deeper than men are possessed by the mind which expects a certain look which then women try to match to fit in with the man's mind world fantasy. What men take off at the end of the day is the ego of "who I am". Men we often wake up and mentally put on all of our ideas out the world while it seems my wife just gets up and feels her way around the world throughout the day which is a lot easier. Men put on mental masks that we see the world through and that often is harder to take off than something physical and a heavy burden throughout the day as the heels and tight dress might be. The more women give up trying to fit the the mind world the more men are likely to give up putting on the masks of being a big deal, high roller, super confident, and big shot!


Thats a wonderful compliment to my work. Thank you!!! What an interesting and exceptionally accurate perspective!!! I never really looked at it like that. It is indeed a heavy weight to wear on a daily basis... a lot of pressure.

Each side should help the other really... then things would probably become a lot 'lighter' all round.

Thanks again for your always awesome input :)


You're welcome I appreciate you taking the time to reply here to let me know my reply was useful!

Great story! Love the ask at the end! Looking forward to connecting and communicating on this little community station :) Thanks again for your arts <3 Keep them coming!


Thanks honey :) Much appreciated! and right back at you xxx

I don't make it a habit to be around other men when they get done with their day and turn in for the night BUT, I can tell you how mine typically goes. First thing comes off is the shoes and socks. Then my feet get a tiny massage and I head to the washroom. Wash my hands, brush my teeth and go back to my room. Then My hat comes off and put up. (I keep hats the way most women keep shoes). Then my shirt. Then my pants/shorts and I hop in the shower. That's where the days stress comes off. I sleep naked so nothing else gets put on until morning. But that's me. IDK about other guys.


Sounds like a good routine. :) Especially the middle and the end :D Let's see some of those hats... ;) (that's a post in itself)


Ok lol! I just took some pictures of a few of my favs. Be posting them soon :p

Here's a challenge that very few women will accept: shave your head and stop wearing makeup!
No way! Right?
But despite MUCH resistance, I decided to give it a try.

Because I wanted to see who I was underneath the "beauty, mystery, grace and elegance" that is expected of being a woman.

I wanted to know:

Could I stand as a human being if I took away everything that made me womanly or feminine?

The result was that yes! I could! And it was one of the most empowering things I have ever done.
Because I learned how to value myself as simply someone that is alive here, with value just for being alive. And it also clarified for me my reasons for dressing up and wearing makeup or not - where I am seeing it more now as a form of self-expression rather than trying to achieve a standard of beauty.

I also like looking good! But I can be cool the other way to, and not have my life become a competition or trying to keep up with anyone.

I don't think it is absolutely necessary to go to this extent, but it's always cool to challenge self!

Great article to open up these points!

Here is me right after shaving my head:


Awesome! Love it - No, I would never go to that extreme - so hats off (or hair off) to you!!! that took balls!

My dear, you have it right! After I get out of the shower at night and look at myself in the mirror, I still think I look beautiful in my own right, but I "doubt" that society would see me the same way - and the sad thing (for me) is that they probably would... because they don't give a sh*t - but I still doubt that fact.

I suppose it is one of my mountains still to climb yeah?

but you are 110% spot on!

How Karl Lagerfeld said:
"Anyone wearing jogging trousers has lost control of his life."


Hahahaha love it!!! 🤣😁👌



om nom nom :D


Nom nom?

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The most satisfying thing to take off at the end of a long work day for me has to be steel toe work boots, you feel so free afterward, and for those who wear glasses, taking them off after a long day feels great too.


Oh YES!!!!! i can completely relate to the glasses!!!!! It is the best feeling to get into bed and read and reply to comments etc. On my phone...(as i am now) like a total rebel, without my glasses... screwing my eyes up even more. Hehehe.... totally worth it 😁👍😎

Ha ha, Jaynie. The memories! Ouch.

I live simply now. Dress casually. Rarely wear make up.

Being an author who can write wherever she wants, wearing whatever she wants, helps. :-)

It feels SO good.



Hahaha a well earned place to be 👌

I think we are over complicating stuff here. Men might take of their shoes, tie and top off a beer bottle. .......maybe two or five beer bottles depending on their day. 🍻


hahaha love it!

Very great post! :)


Thank you :) I appreciate the positive feedback x

Found you through Jerry Banfields post:) I know the residents in the nursing home I work love to be rid of hoists wheelchairs and medical equipment to just be free for them all for 12 hours and are so happy to go to bed as themselves <3
Me? I never have left the house yet without my make up i would feel totally naked xD ... but yet it feels so refreshing to wipe it all away before bed when u can smell the lovely smell of moisturiser in the air :)


Thanks for the lovely comment @aineyann - and yes... totally agree... I would feel naked going out "unprepared" lol


me too, and its definitely not vanity, just feel so weird without xD


If I was to refer to my post today about honesty... https://steemit.com/life/@jaynie/are-you-honestly-honest

I would say it probably has more to do with insecurity... (to be honest. lol) :)


I am on my way to check it out!



It would be shoes for most men I guess. Then it's the belt. And for the suited people it has to be the tie.

Seriously speaking about the make up and all that, was it always there? Aren't things being invented? Did our grandmothers do as much make up as our sisters do? Consumerism and commercialism are two words which explain a lot of things about how we have been 'hard-wired.'


I agree with you and no - a LOT of that was never there... but by "there" I was referring to the fundamental desire to please our male counterparts :)


The fundamental mutual attraction between men and women is understandable. However, commercialism has reduced the status of women to objects of pleasure and display. Our ladies have so much to do in order to be seen and viewed as beautiful. That's a lot of effort not focused on pleasing themselves but others.

The discussion may go on but I think I have said my thing. Do share your views too.


Thank you for your input. and yes - I COMPLETELY agree with you!

This post received a 4.6% upvote from @randowhale thanks to @jaynie! For more information, click here!