Can You Forgive a Cheater?
A pretty tough question, right? It's easy to say that we should forgive those who have committed mistakes on us for our own peace of mind. But at the same time, we should also remember that we need to feel the pain and anger before we can allow ourselves to forgive. We can't just give a half-baked forgiveness because that's not right. That's unfair to both parties. Because when you forgive someone, that means you choose to leave the past behind and you're willing to start anew with that person. But you can't do that if his mistakes still haunts you.
You have to take everything slowly. Eventually, you'd have to forgive that person to give yourself a peace of mind. You can't allow pain and anger linger in your heart for a very long time. But there is no rush when it comes to forgiving someone. Take your time. Do it at your own pace. Allow yourself some time to process everything that happened and then heal the wounds it created. When that time comes, I think you can finally try to forgive slowly. Yes, slowly. You don't have a deadline.
You have to make sure that when you say, "I forgive you", you really mean it and that you know what that phrase means. But that doesn't always end there. Can you still trust that person like before? Can you really give your relationship another shot? To say that you were heartbroken when your partner cheated on you was a huge understatement. You got hurt big time, you cried, felt miserable and unloved. So, can you still forgive him after everything he did? The answer might be yes. But the real question is: can you give him another chance?
You should remember that forgiving doesn't always mean giving that person another chance. It's not a package deal. You can forgive an ex-partner without jumping back to the same relationship he ruined. Forgive because you deserve to live peacefully and happily. Forgive because you have to set yourself free from all the negativities and dramas. But remember that it is still your decision. If you think that you can still try to fix your relationship and you can work on the "trust issues" that would surely come after a cheating incident, then by all means, give it another try.
You deserve to be loved that's why you should know your worth. Don't settle for less. Don't hold on to a toxic relationship. Don't let anyone cheat on you and get away with it. You should know when to use the EXIT door when you've already exhausted your patience. Remember that better things are coming, so why linger on the bad things?
howdy from Texas @jassennessaj! how old are you anyway? :)Because my first impression of you is that you're a "youngun" as we say in Texas, but your wisdom is of one much older so I salute you. I think in many cases when we have been betrayed and we need to forgive someone so that it doesn't eat away at us and damage OUR emotions and mental health...the first step has to a mental decision and we have to say it even if we don't feel it at first. But if we keep saying it then our hearts will follow and then something amazing happens as God gives us love for them, even if we never are in the same relationship again..we can hope the best for them, even pray for them. You are so correct, it is to set US free and also puts us in a position to walk in love but as you say it's not an immediate fix. great post and very encouraging, thank you and God bless you all in the Philippines!
Hello there @janton. Thanks for dropping again on my post. I'm 22 years old. I'm honored by what you say.
Absolutely, the world may be sometimes cruel. For me, the most important part of being cheated is knowing that it exist and you'll be more cautious next time.
howdy @jassennessaj and thanks for your reply. You are wise beyond your years. Yes, you are correct about being cautious, it's too bad that we have to be that way but it's the way of man everywhere.
Thanks @janton! Pleased to meet you actually. How about you? How old are you? That's actually the reason why as of the moment I still don't have a serious relationship. Just getting to know girls finding the perfect one (for my eyes). Lol
oh, looking for the perfect girl! What a fantastic age to be alive, there is no pursuit more exciting! and there are alot of great choices in your country?
find one with a good job! Number one requirement! lol.
I'm 64, hard to believe sometimes because I don't feel like it. Been thru several careers and now looking for another one. Your English is excellent, they teach it as a second language in the Philippines?
Yep! There's no need to look for neighboring countries (or even outside space lol). That's a great advice, my friend. I'll take that.
I'm interested on your work experience. You can offer it in the platform and will forever be saved on the blockchain.
Hmm. Not so so. Yes, english is taught here and widely used as a medium of communication in school, work, etc.
I guess once a cheater is always a cheater. They would never change . You really made a sense @jassennesaj . You shared a very informative post. Thank you for sharing
. I am still a newbie here and I would like to learn more about Steemit from you.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts @anne0130. Ohh! Welcome to Steemit ! :)
Thank you so much @jassennesaj :) Following you from now on :)
Forgiving a cheater is very hard and the trust you had once for that person won't ever be the same anymore cause you'll have doubts for that person. @jassennessaj this is a very deep message.
I just came from @junebride who also posted the same topic and earlier I read a post by @rakitera with the same topic.
Guard your hearts! Guard yourself from the influence that others may have on you, what you watch, what you read, what you hear.
jass kahugot ba ani hahaha
The long wait is over now @jassennessaj , You give me Wisdom and a peace of mind that i've kept all over the years. I'll stick to do it on my own pace, no rush, give time to heal and forgive slowly until it's fade away. Thank you! Thank you!