Take my hand.
No, don't, I'll leave you here.
I won't mean to, but I will.
I can't save you if you can't save yourself.
You can't depend on me,
I can't stop you from drowning.
I'll only push you in deeper,
Until fresh air is no more.
And you will scream
In your own mind
'Why didn't you save me?'
But I'm not here to save you.
I don't even know if I can save myself.
All I can do is find my touchstones,
All I can do is understand what makes me me
And hope for the best.
If you wait for me to come,
You will wait forever.
I will never be yours,
I can only be mine.
You wave at me from the fire
And I pray you didn't have to drown.
All your life, you waited for me.
Or someone else.
All your life, you dreamed of saviors,
You depended on others' touchstones
And not your own.
But their stones crumbled,
And now you're all alone.
You'll die and I'm sorry.
But I only know who I am,
And I only know how to save me.
You really should've learned how to save yourself.
This is not a poem. I didn't want it to be a poem. It's just a collection of disparate thoughts. Or maybe just desperate thoughts.
Thank you for reading,