I've been stewing - on ideas, music, life. Starting up!

Haven't wrote for a little while. Ah, I've been stewing on my life. Just had a birthday! Saw a couple friends I haven't seen in awhile. Saw the lady I had a relationship with where I got to experience what it was like having a son. Wasn't able to see him 'cause of her being unsure about me. It's cause of my unique living experience with my other family. Suffice to say I finally saw the boy I hadn't seen in a couple years. It makes sense I've been listening to the new Delerium album! She likes them too!!

Really got into the new Delerium Mythologie album. It is what pop music sounds like when humanity grows up a little bit. Have been craving that adult contemporary/folk art record and this is it! Feels good to be a fully emotional and aware human being. There is much in life I could tell or express. I've been wanting that artistic expression release. I've had a week or so more or less relaxing so I feel I'm coming to myself a bit more so to speak lately. I've talked like this before. The waves are coming in more intense and clear!

Had this eczema like condition on my right hand and it has almost cleared up. My living partner had a facial ulcer that is now clearing up. It's from emotional stress as well as working conditions. Having an emotional breakthrough here! Whew! I'm calming down in ways to be able to write some music and make art as a daily routine. Just saying it here now is making a difference.

I feel I'm not so much worried about old relationships or hard to bond with friends. People will come around if it feels right I believe. My personal breakthroughs keep on coming. And the musics I've been into have been helping. Have always felt that on the threshold feeling. Glad I've kept it. Now I don't feel so tired.

I've been thinking about politics in the states and FuckTrump and all that. All the protests and such. The politicians and institutions got nothing, the whole scene is shabby and see through. Who knows what's staged or not, point is it's a cartoon - and it's time for cartoon detox rehab!

I'm glad the issue of pipelines has come around. The natives are on it! And people think the jews had it bad, first nations had it the worst, it ain't no joke. I feel the whole vibe of our culture can change for reconciliation and the laws can change. You have the first nations saying prayers, protecting the water for all people, saving their sacred burial grounds in peaceful ways, and then you have the military coming in with batons! Shameful. Shame on the military mentality. Fuck the military industrial complex. And all the political pundit tail tuckers who endorse it.

So yea I feel the fire burning to make create and express. I've had enough encouragement from music and artists. There is much energy in my life to say something. Many external issues to address and internal passions to express. I'm glad I'm a family guy too. It doesn't matter anyones opinion or if they like me - if the kids like me then I'm alright. They are the standard. I get along with children fairly well I know. It's part of my philosophy of staying cheery in a grumpy world. What kid would want to live in a grumpy world. I can't think of any. I won't let these adults abuse their inner child in their adult body either! My interaction with latent friends will be well guarded. Shake the sillies out. Not to be too serious either but serious enough. Life is great and it's a big deal. That's all for tonight folks! Cheers!