Did you know that people lie an average of three times during the first 10 minutes of meeting someone new? And that more than 80% of lies are not discovered ?!
"In general, we have a choice about the position we take in life," Eckman said. "If we take a skeptical attitude, life will not be fun, because we will not get lies and misinformation all the time. If you decide to adopt a position of trust, life will be more enjoyable; it is much better than trying to look for lies all the time even with the nearest people. "
But because the deception is everywhere, it is necessary to detect a lie that may be harmful before it branch out and become out of control; that you search for at least 2 or 3 of the following semantic tags in the first seconds of conversation with someone you meet for the first time.
Well, here in this article are some neat signs and tricks to discover lies.
First: listen to the tone and rhythm of the sound, and observe the structure of the sentences
Often when a person speaks without the truth, both the tone and the rhythm of his voice change slightly; he may begin to speak faster or slower, and the sound of higher or lower than before, in addition to that often, become the sentences that they use More complex, as the brain works to overcome the lies to keep up with their story!
Second: Reduce or even stop talking about breathing
We see those who lie sometimes begin to remove themselves from the story they tell, and instead focus their attention on others. So, you will hear fewer "I"; psychologically this is an attempt to distance themselves from the lies they make.
Third: Give a lot of details
Often the liar speaks a lot and cares about giving a lot of details; it seems more convincing. If the story he tells you is not real and feels that he has already been trained, ask him to answer questions that will make him tell you again to find out whether there are discrepancies between the two novels or ask him for deeper details inside the story, if not Able to do so or find him trying to evade answering or changing the subject of speech; there are chances that he lies.
In addition, according to the eye movement parameters discussed in the book John Grindler and Richard Bandler; if you asked someone to remember a purple violet color as an example of something or event that does not already exist, it tries to form a picture in her mind, To the left, and vice versa to the left person.
Fourth: Modifying his position to feel comfortable
Someone who lies is someone who does not feel comfortable. Therefore, we often find that the liar is too much of a movement and tries to change his place or even just modify the position he sits or stands, or he touches things in front of him again and again, the important that it does not prove on the same movement, but when someone hides the truth, To shuffle their feet or put their arms cross in front of the chest in an attempt to give themselves a sense of protection.
In fact this behavior is what tells us why the suspected CIA agents sit on swivel chairs during interrogation, so that their movements are amplified and focused on them.
Fifth: Knit or touch parts of the body
When we are under pressure, the blood travels away from the nose, ears and hands, making it cooler. Therefore, the liar may be more likely to rub or touch these parts of the body constantly.
While this movement is very natural and any of us can do it, but it abounds with those who lie, their proportion increases significantly in the case of lying.
Sixth: stare or avoid visual communication
Whenever we feel guilty about someone, we can not completely look in his eyes or continue to maintain visual contact with him in the same way; you see the liar looking everywhere around him except the eyes of his interlocutors, while the liar deliberately may not avoid visual contact at all , But on the contrary, you might find it waiting to be staring at you instead.
Seventh: Discover attempts to hide emotions;
Although it is possible to hide some feelings, it is very difficult to show a fake smile; the real smile moves with each muscle of the facial muscles, while the phantom moves only the lower half of the face.
In fact this is how others can figure out whether you are happy and really well or whether you are just deliberately making a good appearance while you are really upset!
In general, body language is often noticed when a person draws his body inward when he lies to make himself feel small and dwindle and that he is less clear, or notes the vibration of the shoulder involuntarily, and there are changes in facial expressions resulting from increased brain activity at the beginning of lying such as: Face to light pink sometimes, and sometimes other little redness of the nose or sweating, or bite lips .. Etc. However, these facial expressions are so light that they are difficult to observe.
Now, if you find three or more of the above signs, you have reason to suspect that the person in front of you is lying, and in such a case, you should always treat him with respect and avoid embarrassing him with accusations and assume goodwill, but just do not take all his words seriously, remember That you can not accuse a person of lying just to touch his chin or neck several times, but be smart and take your time to decide, as you have to note the repetition of these signs and a lot, otherwise you will analyze the behavior of 9 out of 10 people met them as a lie, Especially that some people appear to have similar signs of tension and what is young for reasons unrelated to him Lying. Therefore, this theory is used only when needed.
To understand human behavior; there are a lot of codes and puzzles to be found in verbal and nonverbal communication, for example, do you know if someone is flirting with you? And if he feels bored in the conversation?
Those who understand these hidden movements have something that distinguishes them from others, and there are many great books about human behavior