How to be happy

in life •  last year

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First of all, let's face the truth. It is not possible to be happy 24/7. It is just not going to happen. Everybody has some sad moments in life. Perhaps you are having one right now and decided to read this text. Or perhaps just wanted to try to see one new way to see if you can achieve happiness.

The following paragraphs are just my point of view. I am not very old and not very young. I have lived enough to experience some sad and happy moments. What I am about to write is not supposed to be the only truth. Actually, this is what I am feeling right now and will probably will change in the future. Anyway, that is what I would like to share with you about my opinion about how can you become happier.

I am not writing in any particular order. I am just writing as they come up in my head.

1. Change your perspective

"Is the glass half empty or half full?"
"Is your life half empty or half full?"

Although there is no particular order, I believe this one is the most important.

You know, everything in life is relative. You are probably judging your present life with your past life. Is your life better right now that it was in the past? If it is better, you are probably feeling happy. If not, you are probably feeling sad, disappointed or something like that.

Perhaps, you don't feel happy because your friends are much richer than you. Like I read in a book (I can't remember which one it was), there was a guy who felt rich, until his son said "Dad, why everyone has a private jet and we don't?"

The truth is, you should probably feel happy just because you are able to read this. You have Internet access, you can see, you can read...

You probably have read several stories of "normal" people who become disabled by some type of accident. Some of them just become happier after the accident. Why?

Because they change their perspective. They realize that some things that used to be easy now become difficult and every new task becomes a challenge. They feel that they didn't give enough importance to what really matters and now they can appreciate every detail in life.

"The sky is beautiful today, isn't it?" or "You look beautiful today" or "Wow... Now I can do this much easier than last month"

Which brings me to another point...

2. Have an objective

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"If you don't know where you want to go, then it doesn't matter which path you take"

A way to become happier is to have an objective. "What is the purpose of life?", you might ask. And I will reply "The purpose that you want."

It is really important to have an objective, a target, something you want to achieve ou learn. Actually, the few times that I remember feeling lost it was because I lost or didn't had an objective.

Establish something you want to do and how long it will take to achieve it. Make it something plausible and, if possible, split it into smaller pieces. Check it from time to time and act or replan your objetive if it is not going according to the plan. (PDCA Cycle)

If things are not going according to your plan, don't be sad. Perhaps you have established an objective that was far beyond you are currently capable of achieving. Just aim lower for now and if you can achieve it, set the bar higher.

It is important to achieve your objective to increase your happiness and feel that you are progressing.

Let me give you some ideas of objetives:

  • To be able to do 100 push ups in 6 months
  • To loose 10 pounds in 10 weeks
  • To eat junk food just once a week
  • To learn a new language
  • To discover the cure for cancer within a week
  • To achieve world peace next friday

3. Have a plan B

A long time ago I applied for a scholarship in Japan (maybe I am a little bit old). There was a written test and an interview. Everybody said that if I was able to get to the interview I would definitely be awarded with one. Guess what? I was able to get to the interview and didn't get a scholarship.

I was crushed.

My mom, at that time, realized that I was not well and decided that I should seek some professional help.

I went to a psychologist and she said:

You should always have a plan B

And guess what. She was right (at least in terms of happiness).

What if you don't achieve your goals? What if that girl doesn't like you?

You should always have a plan B so you don't get disappointed because plan A failed. Since you had a backup plan, you won't feel sad because plan A failed.

Besides, sometimes, plan B can become better than plan A.

At that time in my life, I liked a girl and she didn't know I even existed. There was another girl who I used to talk in the Internet but I had never seen her in my life. I also liked her but since she lived in another state, I felt that the odds of that our relationship to prosper was minimal. The first girl was plan A. The second girl was plan B.

Eventually I said to the first girl that I liked her, but, of course, she didn't like me. Then I decided to go to plan B.

Guess what?

I married plan B 😁

Ok, ok. This text is becoming too long. I will stop it for now. Perhaps I will continue it another day. Please upvote if you like it or if you want me to continue it.

And... English is not my native language so if you see any grammar mistakes, please point them out for helping me to improve my english skills.

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