Abandoned Children and Their Long Lost Fathers
I was checking out the blog of a new user @xtian2121, when I saw she shared this vid.
You can see the post here, but it doesn't say anything other than link to the vid.
I don't want to condemn any of them.
We're all just living on this rock, trying to survive, and deal with our emotions and hormones. It sucks! It's horrible! It's literally unbearable at times.
It's easy to talk negatively about sex workers. People always do it. When I see this though, I think about them just trying to make money to survive in the world. This world isn't perfect. You need to constantly work to trade for food, clothing, and a place to live. It's not like before, where you could forage for food. People have laid claim to every morsel of land. You have to work every day and struggle to survive sometimes.
So these rich foreigners come, and maybe they're lonely, maybe they aren't so good at finding someone. Maybe they just want to have sex and aren't so good at picking up women. Whatever the reason, they have money, and these sex workers want it. I don't feel it's right to condemn either of them for that action. It's hard being human.
Then some of them father children. Our social constructs say that a father is supposed to stick around and support their children, and the mother. A look at history shows they don't always do though. Clearly, not all males have this drive to care for their young. So yet again, I feel hesitant to condemn them. I would rather praise the ones that choose to stay, or even just help out financially. Even the asshole that only helped out a little every month, at least he did help out that little, and I thank him for that. I don't give him that much thanks though, as it wasn't much, but it was something.
Not everyone was made to be a parent.
Society pressures us all to be parents, whether or not we have had children, but the sad fact is that not all of us are cut out for it. We can try, and many of us do, but some really suck at it. We're the only option for our kids though. If we can't cut it, they may end up suffering more, as a foster child.
Condemning them for their actions does nothing.
We can choose to condemn these parents for doing what humans have done for our entire existence, have sex, and have children, but it doesn't solve the problem. The sheer fact that the fathers abandoned them lends to the idea that perhaps they really aren't cut out to be parents. Why do we not condemn society for not doing anything about the suffering of the masses?
Condemning them doesn't solve the problem anyway. We can arrest the sex workers for selling their bodies, but that doesn't solve the problem. We can arrest the clients and fine them for their actions, but that's likely just an excuse for the police to make money. So what do we do?
Try to solve the problem, rather than blaming people and punishing them.
We have these kids that need to be taken care of, and parents that are struggling to do so. The children of sex workers aren't the only ones suffering. This documentary just shined a light on them. We as a society need to band together, to take care of us all. It's a lot easier if we work together.
You can argue against red tape, and bureaucracy, and socialism, but I think most will realize that it sucks, and something has to be done. We have to work together to solve society's problems. Whether that means providing food for the hungry, or caregivers for children, or an opportunity for a child to learn, to become something more. We have to stop just complaining about the problems, and work together to solve them.
Why can't we give the poor permission to use the land they need?
We have land all over that people could farm on, but we have this crazy level of permissions that we have to have to do so. Someone claimed the land hundreds of years ago, then gave permission to use it to another, who gave it to another, etc. Maybe it's time to set aside some of that land again for use by the general public, to farm, and raise food for the poor. The poor need food and many would be willing to work for it. Why not let them farm it themselves, and teach them how?
Why can't people work together?
I almost feel like our societal images of the way things should be gets in the way of doing things in a way that's beneficial to all. We have this idea of a family unit being a mother and a father taking care of a child. Not everyone has a mother and a father though. Rather than letting those few suffer more hardship, why can't we work together? I feel like if we all banded together instead, we wouldn't have so much suffering.
Do we need to create a new fiction?
We have these concepts of things that we have created. Governments, family units, child care services, are all fictions that we have created. It almost seems like we have to create something new, so we have a concept of what we should do. Everyone just working together to care for one another doesn't seem to work unless we have some kind of guidelines of what people should do, so people have a clear set of rules of what they are supposed to do.
So, do we need to create community centers where people can go to eat, with food and cooking provided by members, and places to take their children, without having to pay, so they can work? What kind of fiction do we need to create to get it so people aren't suffering so much?
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everyone needs money to survive these days, but the people who don't have anything to trade to get the money, find stuff to make money. A sex worker is better than a criminal at least, they made an awesome choice of not stealing from other people and instead offered them what they like, in return for the money. Also if a person is a "sex worker" doesn't always mean that they are doing it for their survival, in some countries people do sex trade for becoming more prosperous.
Take prosperity of the Wild West for example. it's to long to write about it. Just watch this video from Adam Ruins Everything. about How Prostitutes Settled the Wild West
Some even choose it because they prefer it over other jobs. Every job exploits you, but some pay you better for the opportunity.
That was an interesting show. I didn't know all that about "The Wild West".
But the real problem lies in the lack of awareness of pregnancy prevention. I mean if you are a sex worker, It's kinda your responsibility to avoid unwanted pregnancy. I may sound like an asshole right now, but it's not fair to the children that they are brought into this world without a guardian. Whats the solution you ask? "Education". Educated sex workers don't get impregnated, Unwantedly. The Education is the solution, they need to educate the people, and license that shit. so that only educated people can become sex workers.
Maybe their govt is asshole or it's all corrupted.
I hate this fucking world. Gaaarrrrhhhhhhhh.
It should be Illegal to be pregnant unless you can support the child.
RAAAAAAAAAGEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, how dare someone use their own genitals without governmental permission.
In at least one case in the video, the woman was raped. The one that got convinced the guy had a vasectomy has no excuse though, as she was still risking STD's.
That's evolution at work right there. Does stupidity increase the likelihood of you becoming pregnant? Then it's an evolutionary advantage to be stupid.
As my post was alluding to, I think the solution is to change the system so there is more support, so that the children don't have to worry if their parents are poor. There are multiple possible solutions on how to do this.
I detect sarcasm, are you saying its "ok" to bring a child into this world and abandon them?? they didn't ask to be born, into this cruel world. Creating a life and abandoning it, should be illegal.
You can use your own genitals for whatever purpose you want unless you take the responsibility for what comes afterward.
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Because if you don't take responsibility for the mess you created and made money off it, it's not Fair. It's not fair to the society, it's not fair to the innocent child. it's not fair to the people who end up taking care of the children for the sake of humanity.
No, I'm saying that people have children, and society should help everyone so not a single one is abandoned.
Prostitution as the world's oldest profession is a phrase I've heard a few times before. But since we're all in the age of having to be PC, I'll just cite is as one of the world's oldest profession. Since ancient history and even in the bible, prostitution has already been around. And it wasn't until the last few centuries had it been in the spotlight for condemnation. Sure, prostitutes weren't exactly high up on the social ladder before then. But it's not as bad as it is today when sex trade has been linked to the spread of certain diseases. But does it warrant the hate they get? I don't think it should. As you said, being human is hard.
It's easy for a lot of people to say can't they get a better job? Uh.. not everyone is privileged enough to have gone to school or have connections. Not everyone is landed among other things. Sometimes, when push comes to shove, we do things to survive. And personally, I think stealing, extorting, selling illegal drugs, etc are far, far worse in the list of to-do things for survival. That being said, I think the lack of support from the government and society as a whole are contributing factors as to why this industry is going strong and with it, the number of fatherless children. There is a lack of alternatives for livelihood as well as the lack of education on the risks of being in such a trade. And the rest of the society are also quick to judge and write off anyone associated with a sex worker. There is a lack of empathy for the children and they often have to suffer the judgement of society for being born to a parent working in that trade. But it only feeds more negativity into an already difficult situation.
Perhaps condemning people eases the guilt? By passing on the burden of blame, people feel that they are not responsible for the current situation. Maybe they are right, or maybe they are wrong. But the situation is already there regardless and I agree, we have to band together to help each other. And with that in mind, I find it interesting that I can't seem to recall any charity event targeting that sector in our society. Then again, perhaps there are existing charities but they're probably not too known or publicized to avoid the stigma associated with the sex trade.
The situation is only made worse by illegalization. It means that it's harder for them to get healthcare, or to seek the help of the law.
https://prostitution.procon.org/view.answers.php?questionID=000107
That site covers whether or not the incidence of STD's would be lowered with legalization. The cons have mostly to do with one particular option, a test card, which they point out is pretty much useless.
Put another way, sometimes it's the best job available. Good pay. Flexible hours.
Sex workers aren't even always uneducated. In America, some of them are even highly educated.
We have this view of sex work as dirty, and the sex workers as poor people whose only option is the sex trade. Reality is often far different than the visions we paint. In this case, that vision is based on our prejudice.
But condemn them or not, we should not condemn the children.
I don't think they even necessarily need one targeting them. Just one that isn't discriminatory.
Which is what the government should re-evaluate. Clearly, if the Plan A isn't working, they should consider a Plan B, C, D and so forth. But hand-in-hand with the rest of the society, a blind eye method is used.
We have this view of sex work as dirty, and the sex workers as poor people whose only option is the sex trade. Reality is often far different than the visions we paint. In this case, that vision is based on our prejudice.
I do agree. It's why I listed other stuff after. I only put the education in the fore because it's true for most in third world countries where I live in. And in the Philippines, the emphasis in education being a must is almost equivalent to breathing. There are college students who engage in escort services simply to put themselves through college.
No, we shouldn't. At all. It's a steep battle to change the mindset of people about that especially in more conservative countries.
I think there isn't one targeting them because they are being discriminated against. If the children who aren't at fault are suffering through the stigma of being related to a sex worker, it's not a far-fetched notion that the sex workers themselves are in the middle of it.
Yeah, they should. But they won't. At least they won't do it on their own. I think society needs to work together from the start to solve our problems. Right now we squabble over little differences though, rather than trying to find a plan that we can all agree on.
That's actually a stereotype here about "strippers". (Girls that take off their clothes in bars for money.)
Considering how much we charge for something considered necessary to earn more money and get yourself out of poverty, it's not surprising. It would be nice if we at least allowed self-study to get your degree, so the poorest had a chance without getting into extreme debt.
Currently, here we have them jump through hoops to prove they are worthy.
Absolutely. Because of that discrimination, any charity targeting them might have difficulty getting funds.
Great text bravo! You really gave us some topics to think about...
We were just talking about this maybe a few hours before this post was made and now you already have it. Who among your 500 alter ego did this? :D
There are several organizations that help the poor but I do not think that sex workers get that support. I'm afraid they're even avoided by these charities. Most of our charities are run by religious groups, or at least have someone religious in the team, which isn't a really good combination in this case. I think there are real good and helpful religious people but most are selective in who they help. Plus most people think it's their choice to work that way, they fail to realize that most were just forced to because of their life cicumstances.
Forced to or not, I think it shows a moral failing in its self to judge someone so negatively for who they choose to have sex with, even if it's for money. No person can decide who someone has sex with other than themselves.
Unfortunately, that's how the society they are in thinks. And so no or little help reaches them. It's a "conservative" society and we have this culture of shame. From here, they see the moral failings (ie sex) on the part of the sex worker but not in themselves.
It should take a lot for you to ignore the suffering of another...but that's just my moral beliefs. Perhaps some are more of the "burn the unclean" variety...
"Burn the unclean" is kinda extreme but I know there are those who see them as just sinners. It's complicated why people overlook the needs of the sex workers, which in effect overlook the children. There is a lot of concern for the suffering but this group doesn't get as much attention. For one, what they do is illegal even if they have a "red light district". What I often see on the news are policemen raiding the night clubs and arresting them. And I know that I still don't see the whole picture coming from the Philippines who hasn't been to these places here.
To add, I felt more hatred towards those foreigners who left the kids. I dont care if they want paid sex. But they should know better and not just make babies and dump them. :/
It's the hardest for me to not condemn the people that abandoned their kids.
When I think about it though, society is also ignoring them. They want to say it's only the responsibility of the father and the mother, but that seems wrong to me. It feels to me like the common good of all humans is the responsibility of all of humanity.
I also haven't been to the red light district. But I can see their suffering, and I can't blame them for doing whatever they have to, to make money to survive. I also have felt loneliness, and the urge to have sex, and I can imagine it's even worse for some, even with it not being easy for me. For that reason, I can't blame those that want to have sex, and pay for it.
I don't mean that I don't see their suffering just because I havent been there. Of course I do. But all these things happening for decades must be a lot of things and I don't undestand and can't blame anyone why they're getting ignored. I don't even know if some of them want help. There must be a few good people who have done some actions about this. But I don't know.
Maybe if prostitution is legalized then there will be laws giving them rights and access to info and education. I'm sure this will never happen here. Pre-marital sex, using contraceptive pills even with our reproductive health law, etc are discouraged by the pious (majority) groups here. What more prostitution. (ok i maybe getting off topic now, really sleepy, night!)
Legalization of prostitution has had positive effects in many places that have had a prostitution problem. They've been able to get access to much needed governmental assistance.
Basically, treating people like humans has benefits.
Whilst I haven’t gotten to the end of the video as I’m at work and don’t want to take the piss. You have presented something that is very close to my heart.
Prostitution in so many of these countries is so prominent because it is a demand from the tourists, and mostly men. Supply and demand.... it’s pretty bloody basic business strategy. It is not a culturally driven trade at all, and is shunned by most Asian cultures. Women are born with this tool kit, and use it to take care of themselves, their children and service these tourists. Hence here is they cycle they can not easily break from. So far in the video I have noted a few that feel as though they were raped after they had become intoxicated, no doubt at the rapists expense. I think the very core problems that even induce the west travelling for sex, is the disrespect of women and children that seems very prominent all over the globe, coupled with the craziest of our legal drugs alcohol. I believe this legal drug to be behind so many cases of abuse. In a patriarchal world we have a group of very entitled individuals who disrespect the masses all under the guise of being the majority group. I think it’s fair to say, that if all the minorities effected by the patriarchal fallout (that supports but a few), we would see exactly who is the minority group... tis a very sad state of affairs where the need for sex with out respect reigns over a woman and child’s livelihoods. Then the slut shaming that follows, and the lack of human kindness and responsibility to look after children conceived this way is abhorrent. Don’t get me started on the peadophiles who don’t identify with being peadophiles as they are not committing the crime in their own country.... there are massive numbers of those entitled criminals, who are hiding right beside us..
I will watch this video with interest when I am home from work tonight.