At a hard fork...

Did you get triggered?

My hard fork is the path of my life. Lately I have been questioning what I am doing.
#CHRONICandCOFFEE and #GreenHouseRadioOnline are my projects intended for me to make my own way in life for me.
As most things in life, the more you put into something the better it is. In this case I am weighing my options about trying to actualize my efforts into a paying gig.
Not just getting the rewards from STEEM but evolving further and taking it to the next levels. I would love to get out of the bedroom and be able to be LIVE for more CHRONICandCOFFEE episodes. On scene for the interviews would be the idea.
After recently trying this with only my wife's cell phone as the medium I realized that would not be good enough.Shitty pics, shitty video ruined what I had hoped to accomplish.
I have also experienced issues with the equipment I have, the lap top and my headsets.
So to become a better 'product' I need to invest in some better equipment.

FACT: I need to upgrade many things such as recording devices,headsets/mic- tech for streaming, and for the #GHRO project I need to obtain licenses to be able to offer more music, as well as any other costs to operate.
FACT: I am broke as fuck, even with part time job, even with a wife who has a good job.

QUERY: Should I even stress about these things? Is it worth the effort in the first place?
QUERY: Does anyone care about what I am trying to do? Would they be willing to help me continue my efforts?

I do not like being a place where I need to ask for help, yet it seems that I do indeed need some. I am not looking for charity. I am looking for people to help me find ways to achieve my goals/dreams.
Maybe I should let the dream die...Stop struggling...
Any one have any suggestions?
Thank You for your time.