I’m Old School
I grew up in an old farm house, in a tiny village in central Finland, with my parents and two younger siblings, and my grandmother from fathers side until I was 5-years-old, then she moved next door. My mother was, and technically is, a stay-at-home mom, the most natural thing a woman can be in my opinion. My childhood was happy, healthy and I was content, most of that I credit to my parents fulfilling their roles as traditional stay-at-home mom, and dad being the sole provider.
These days the western world is all about female CEOs, buildying careers, making moves and doing anything a man used to do, including fucking the women too. I am not hating on females who want to build a succesful career and be in leadership roles, nor am I hating on gays, but I am guestioning if it is really what most females need and want. I think the media is playing a huge role in making women pursue careers, instead of making babies and rasing them.
Why is this? What is the benefit of it?
I wonder what is the goal with pushing women out of the kitchen and into the offices. I would argue that equality is not the reason, because women in my opinion had it far better before than they do now. Is it to control the overpopulated world? Is it to lessen the pressure on men to be the sole provider for their family? What is the benefit of women having fewer children and at a much older age than a century ago? What good does it do to push women to work outside of the family home and if they have babies, putting them into daycare, to be raised up by a stranger from young age. Let me know what you think about this.
From a biological point of view, women are made to bare children and nurture them into healthy adults. Men are made to spread their seed and protect their offsprings and females. Our bodies serve a purpose and disrupting that with hormones and social construct makes the world go upside down in my opinion. I was taking hormonal birth control for years and I can’t even know yet the full extent of how much that fucked me up. I have also done a fair amount of research into how harmful it is to female health, and to everyones health when it gets to our water supply. Why do we fight nature? In the end, nature will prevail, we might not.
I’m not saying that gender roles in the family have to be completely black and white, not at all, but in general, I vote for the traditional model of women taking care of the family at home, and men bringing home the bacon.
I don’t think every women should be a stay-at-home mom, or mom at all, but I think it comes far more naturally to most of us than working as a head of marketing department in a global company. Not to forget the happiness aspect, are women really more happy buyilding careers than as raising their children at home? And what about the children they have, are they happier and better off being raised in day-care and school, rather than by their mom?
I am of course not a scientist or don’t have a masters degree in gender studies, this is merely how I see the world. If you disagree with me, you can ignore the parts about our natural roles, and consentrate on the parts where I talk about what I want in life.
Being a strong independent woman makes me miserable
You might know that I have a tattoo that says ”I should be in the kitchen” which is only partly because I used to be a chef, and more so my world view. What makes me the most happiest and content in life is to take care of my family at home. I don’t have children, yet, but I know it is what I want. I love nothing more than cooking healthy and versatile meals for my loved ones, doing laundry and keeping the house in check to make sure my family has what they need to go about their day. When ever I visit my birth home, I always cook for my family and I’m very happy doing so, and I know they appreciate it. If I was a nine to five monday to friday working woman and trying to raise a family at the same time, I believe there is no way I could excell in both aspects of life.
I’m sorry (not at all sorry to be honest) that I can’t fit into the new female role that is pushed to us these days in the media. I don’t want to build a career and have a baby in my late 30s, to only stay at home for a year and then throw the toddler into daycare and me going back to my career. That sounds horrible and cruel to all parties involved.
This is not some new revolution I’m having about my life as I get older, it’s something I have always wanted really, actually the only thing I have ever truly wanted. Media, friends, men and women both, western society as a whole have tried to beat it out of me but no, I ain’t buying it. I know what I want. Will I get it, I don’t know, but I will try.
I think you're right about what most women want. Our minds and bodies seem to be adapted to certain roles that you allude to. I agree with that assessment.
The fact that this is really not about freedom of choice and equality is betrayed by how prime minister Esko Aho grilled by a journalist on television for his wife being a stay-at-home mom during a election debate about 15 years ago. There is actual social pressure to send women to work.
In my opinion, it comes down to the economy and the money system. Money is created by commercial banks when they issue loans. That money is created from thin air. The principal is destroyed when the loan is paid back. But what is also payable is interest. That interest can only come from other loans, that is, money created out of thin air. It's a kind of pyramid scheme where the total amount of outstanding debt always exceeds the total amount of money with which to repay the debts. Economic growth means more loans issued (with which to pay back old loans).
Domestic work of the kind stay-at-home mothers do is unmonetized. From the point of view of the money system, that work goes to waste. It's much more useful to send mothers from homes to offices and their children to nurseries to be looked after by women other than their mothers who get paid for it.
Perpetual growth of monetized value creation is key. If growth fails to materialize, there will be credit losses which is very bad for for banks. Enter central banks to create more money through quantitative easing. Central banks may not only lend money to governments but directly buy corporate shares, too, too keep the system afloat. We are currently in a strange economic situation dubbed zombie economy where the system is kept from collapsing only through accelerating quantitative easing programs by central banks. They're contemplating things like negative interest rates and helicopter money (giving people money for nothing to stimulate consumer spending), some consider to be unnatural.
This all ties in with the professionalization of care in general, not only childcare provided for working mothers. Care for the elderly has been outsourced to care facilities from families a long time ago. By the way, has anyone noticed how child protection expenses seem to be ballooning from one year to the next with little respite - despite the average child or youth being healthier and better adjusted than ever? I suspect this, too, is part of the same broader tendency as pushing mothers to workforce participation. Child protection is a fast-growing industry in first world countries. In order to keep the wheels of the system turning, an ever growing share of our lives must be incorporated in the monetary system.
That is a point of view I wasn’t thinking at all, being a mom is labour wasted so outsourcing it creates more jobs. Very interesting and makes sense in terms of monetization. In terms of growing economy, sending moms to work and their children to be raised by other people is smart, but in terms of quality of life, for both parents and children, I don’t think it is a good thing.
It's the worst for children under three years of age. That's because spending the whole day in a large group of other toddlers is too taxing for them. Also, their immune systems are not developed enough to fight off all the infections the spread effectively in nurseries. My daughter was lucky to have grandmothers able to and willing to care for her until she was three. She spent five weeks in a nursery in the autumn following the summer she turned one. She spent three of those five weeks sick at home. It's also better for parent-child bonding to spend enough time together in the early years.
I'm fine with women being stay at home moms or working CEO's :-) Life is about exploring our selves and making choices that fit us. Having the freedom to do that is a luxury some women before us have fought for. Hard. That means now women can choose to not work, work, be a mom, not be a mom. Many didn't have that choice before. I don't even care what's the 'profit' of that for society or economy - I'm very much pro-individualism. You should be able to make choices even if they don't make economical or societal sense. Die happy and unsuccessful is you want :D
I also believe the 'happy mom' story is partially a lie - I unfortunately know many unhappy moms, and although a few are from my generation and we can wonder what it is within our generation that makes moms feel so miserable, I also know my own mother wasn't happy often. She was especially jealous of my father who had a life outside of the house, at some point disliking him because he had dinner with his colleagues or being able to watch a soccer match.
She always loved being a mom by the way, and she quit working when I was born because she didn't want to miss a second of bringing us up, but that doesn't mean she didn't feel isolated, alone, and like her brain melted down to a puddle of mud that was only thinking of dinner plans and when her husband finally would come home :')
She started studying and working when my brother and I were old enough and felt relief and more individuality again. She likes the work she does until today and I'm happy she was able to build a part of her personality that wasn't there when she was 'only' a mother.
Well, that's just one story of course, and some people are able to combine motherhood with another identity and feel amazing or are even able to feel accomplished or whatever by 'only' being a mom. I'm glad they do. I'm also glad we're living in an age where 'old school' mothers can live and 'modern school' mothers as well.
As I said, whatever anyone does doesn't have to serve a bigger purpose, it only should serve you and how you want to live your life.
Can't wait till you are able to make self-portraits with your kid, that might be an awesome challenge I'd love to witness :D
This is truly an excellent post. Resteeming as soon as I finish writing this comment.
You couldn't have said it better and I relate so much to everything you write here. Honestly, I think you're right, it does have alot to do with overpopulation and also with keeping people at each other's throats, same as the people in charge have done for years. Anyone different (in this case, women and men) must be attacked, because God forbid they work together, you know?
I don't know, I can't really imagine what life was like back when women didn't have a choice and I suppose there were some bad parts. But I was thinking last night how good women had it, in many ways..
As you said, it's nature and you can't really argue with nature. Women have that caring instinct for a reason, why are we going against that?
I see more and more girls these days being disgusted at housework, as if making soup or scrubbing the floors is somehow beneath them, particularly if they have a college degree or are in the process of getting one.
I think secretly that's the truth for a lot of women today.
Feminism went off the rails when women stopped fighting for equal rights and started demanding equal obligations. Sure, if a woman wants a career in business, let her go for it. It's only natural that most of her sisters are still going to want families.
I think the sinister plot here (if you're conspiracy minded) is that economic systems demand continual growth. The expectation that women should have to go to work is a quick way of doubling the labor force - and consumption too, since women now have to pay for goods and services that they could otherwise be at home providing for free.
There isn't much of a conspiracy there. It's obvious that women entering the workforce doubles it and that growth will result from that. It is also obvious that economic growth is wanted the captains of the economy, all politicians and just about everyone.
Feminists ruined a good thing women had going on! Making them feel like they are missing out because they are not making their own money and having an impact outside the home. It’s a trap! Don’t fall for it!
It's good that you know how you feel about things when it comes to your own life. It's no one else's business what you do and if you want to cook than fine, want to be a CEO it's also fine. For me it's simply most important to know what it is you are, who you want to be and that you be the best version of it. Very nice post Eve. Me likey. 🙃
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I think the problem is that most people don’t actually think and dig deep to get to know themselves and what makes them happy and content. It’s not about fighting the system or being a lamb if you do what most people do, it’s about knowing yourself and staying true to yourself, be it at any end of the spectrum, or in the middle of it.
Couldn't have said it better myself Eve. That's my design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default ethos...Just in different words. Have a nice day...When it arrives...In several hours...😊
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Great post. I believe there are many reasons for splitting up the family unit in western society. You touched on many I believe there are more. Most seem to be pushing us towards the agenda or masters want to hold more control over us.
I feel one of the biggest reasons to get women in the workforce and not have stay at home moms is to allow the public education systems to program the youth for whatever agenda our masters are pushing.
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Woah, RED is your colour darling!
I know ;)
So why so quiet recently?
Excellent self-examination post...
Some insights can be gained from a book written by Bill Cooper called
"Behold the Pale Horse" (( See below )) There are over 1,000 reviews...
https://www.amazon.com/Behold-Horse-Milton-William-Cooper/dp/0929385225
Interestingly enough, top-secret, government files are the source information for this book, dating back to the 1940's.
As we move into what could be called the "New Paradigm"...
People are waking UP to the manipulative tactics described in the book above...
From a spiritual perspective, we are "shifting" from the "Old Paradigm" of war-like, Masculine Energy, to the
Divine Feminine Energy... that utilizes Grace, Wisdom, Nurturing Energy...
AND... on a Very Positive note...
This awakening is occurring at an ever-increasing rate, because Time Itself, is shifting to a Much Faster, Exponential Rate.
Thanks Again Eve for writing + sharing such a Good/Insightful Post...
Cheers !!
Great shot love all the retro stuff a great era. Have to say i'm more into the Artdeco though 💯🐒
Haha, that last sentence is gold.
Honestly, I think it all comes down to the cost if living... particularly house prices. Most families just can not afford to live off a single income. I've worked with lots of women that love their jobs and their careers... and their husbands/partners stay at home... to look after the kids... and I love that.. but they're also women that are particularly successful and earning really well.
I've also got friends that love motherhood and want nothing more than to raise their children, and while they like their jobs, their heart just isn't in it like it used to be.
Some of the best bosses I've ever had were mothers... they were efficient and left the office on time every day... most other people I work with seem to faff around during office hours and then get their work done in the later hours to give the impression they're going the extra mile. It's frustrating.
I'd love to see more choice. The 50s seemed to be about doing what was culturally-accepted while these days it's more about economic-pressures.
I hope you manage to create the family life you want. You seem like you'd be an amazing parent.
I understand the cost of living, but that is another issue alltogether. We have more than ever before, and we feel like we need more, which all comes at a cost. I’m not here trying to change society or tell what is right and wrong, but this is something I feel like people might not pay enough attention to. It’s much easier for most to just follow the norm and feel the pressure of doing what is expected of them, without thinking deep of what it is that is important.
Again Eve... Excellent thoughts expressed in Your reply.
The "Cost of Living" will drop significantly within the next 10 years... AND how, one may ask??
There are significant energy-related advances that have been intentionally held back over the last 100 years that will re-emerge for many Good/Positive reasons, consider the internet (( Think Global Communication/Sharing ))
Blockchain Technology will eventually "Free the World" from the "Financial Chains/Enslavement" developed by the Rockefeller/Rothschild, OIL/BANKING construct...
HOLD onto Your Hat... because "We ain't in Kansas anymore" and things are going to happen FASTER & FASTER...
We are ALL in "the process" of taking the RED PILL/Awakening, metaphorically speaking... SO...
Enjoy the Ride...
And Try to...
Be KIND to everyone, as much as possible... because this "Rodeo"... is a Global Event.
Yipee Ki-Yay !!
I completely agree... it does feel like everyone around me is just following the script.... university, job, house, family, etc etc... everyone's conversations are really about they've spent their money on... we saw this show, bought this thing, the cost of insurance is outrageous, etc. If everyone stopped and really thought about what they actually, truly needed... well, society might collapse, but I think we'd all be happier.
Raising kids seems to be so different these days too... so many costs, so many toys, but also so many opportunities as well. My half-brother and sister are like 27 years younger than me, and their lives are so incredibly different to mine and my sister closer to my age.