Looking back at when I was a Combat Medic... And young.

I tend not to dwell on my past, for me life is a series of interlinking chapters with a final epilogue after we're gone. The size of that epilogue depends on the what you achieved throughout life. Hell, maybe you can look on your kids as the sequels to your wee book of life. Hopefully they will pass on what you have taught them.

In a few weeks time, I will be 35, nearing the middle of my book of life, the last few chapters have been turbulent but I've still got some adventure left to write.

For myself, the few years that I spent as a Combat Medic (CMT) is of a chapter that I look on as closed, it's done, buried, and closed. From time to time I like to quickly reread a page or two of. The chapter before this was a nightmare, I was from a broken home, and was even stabbed by my own drug addict of a brother, as with most things in life, time was a great healer and such nightmares are just a distant memory.

My first attachment was back in 2002 with the Highlanders on Ex-Grand Prix in Kenya. As a then young lad of 18 years, this period taught me a lot about responsibility, respect, and experiencing a completely different culture for its good and bad points, as well as the importance of a good education and the need for constant self improvement!
There were some absolutely amazing people there, and some absolute monsters of humanity. People were killed just for their boots. I was armed at all times, especially when I was in the Ambulance.

In parts of Africa, the racism between tribes/casts/different ethnicities was staggering. People talk about racism in the West but what happens in Africa between tribes, ethnicities, and even between certain towns is astronomically insane. We were not allowed to travel at night due to armed raiders, which was almost like something from Mad Max.

Corruption, localised racism, ignorance and lack of foresight is holding back parts of Africa. During my time in Africa I witnessed the building of a small educational facility by the British Army for locals. This was done as part of a training exercise but it was an experience which taught me about the proper way to do nation-building, rather than throwing money at a corrupt regime and expecting magic to happen.

My time in the Balklands was also interesting and saddening as to how a nation nearly killed itself. Neighbour fought neighbour, and ignorance ruled the day. Mines put in children's playgrounds, neighbour fighting neighbour and to quote Shakespeare" One sees more devils than vast hell can hold".

The History of the Balkans is a long and complex one, but the ethnic tensions and economic collapse should be a lesson for every politician today. I hope that we never see such madness return to Europe but I fear that the seeds of such madness have started to germinate.

My experiences within the Balkans and Africa taught me the importance of using 'Hearts and Minds' to help with nation building and in all honesty, it seems to be something that has been long forgotten with the UK's current Foreign Aid strategy. Of which I've personally written to the Gavin Williamson M.P detailing a plan of how the UK's armed forces could better deliver our Foreign Aid into regions that are in Need... Although I am opposed to our current Policy, I'd rather the money used by our Armed Forces with the "Hearts and Minds" approach than simply wasted due to corruption and incompetence.

On a personal note, despite everything that happened, the saddest events that I remember were the suicides. Young men who had such potential in life but felt forced to take their own lives. Although we hear about the high number of veterans committing suicide we don't really hear about the many serving personnel who attempt to take their own life.
As a guy, it's easy to bottle shit up, until one day it explodes and you do something that you may never recover from.
If you feel yourself bottling it up and are slipping down that deep and dark slope, then just speak to someone, there's no shame in it. We're not machines we're living, breathing, and emotional creatures, we all have our fears and desires! Just speak to someone, cry it out, even visit a priest if need be, never think the only way to end the confusion and pain is to end your existence. We all have such great potential even though most won't realise that... If you or anyone is struggling then please reach out and check out this link for help:
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/suicide/getting-help/
There's no shame in seeking help, even our greatest heroes have needed help.

Sadly, the British Armed Forces are now a shadow of its former self and I do not see this changing much changing today. There is hope with Gavin Williamson M.P who is now the politician in charge of it but words mean little, actions count a lot.

Looking back, the lessons that I learned were invaluable to the Aid/Education projects that I run in the Middle East today. At times it can feel like a chapter from someone else's book as I rarely talk about it. Most who know me do not know about this period of my life. A chapter which is closed now, and my life has moved on and hopefully onto many more exciting but unwritten chapters...

This was a rather unscripted post but let me know in the comments if you prefer this 'off the cuff' style of writing and what sort of topics you'd like me to write about.