The Avengers if it was made in the 80s
It took Marvel five movies for the Avengers to assemble. But the current phase of movies weren't the first foray into the cinematic universe for Marvel. Imagine that in some alternative universe that Marvels first entry in there cinematic universe, Howard the Duck released in 1986, instead of being one of the shitiest movies ever made, was a critical and commercial success. Coupled with a successful run of The Incredible Hulk television series , which in all fairness was actually decent. Marvel would have undoubtedly had the confidence to fund other films from their intellectual properties. Aside from the Hulk donning pleated pants and some dodgy hairdo’s on display the Avengers line would be completely different. This is how Avengers may have assembled if it was made in the 80s.
Iron Man – Burt Reynolds
In his own words Tony Stark is a genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. And in the 80s there is only one guy that could play Stark, Burt Reynolds. Burt Reynolds was a colossal name back in the 80s and he had the credits to back up his status as one of the biggest stars of the era. Demonstrating his comedy acting chops in Smokey and the Bandit and Cannonball Run. Reynolds was also not to be messed with, he had shown in Deliverance that he could handle himself. Burt Reynolds oozed charm and charisma, and that made him very likable. Reynolds certainly had the gravitas to make the role of Tony Stark his own. As for the facial hair, Reynolds mighty moustache would make Downey Jnr’s goatee look like a pre-pubescent school boy attempt at best.
Captain America – Charlie Sheen
Back in the 80s Charlie Sheen was quite a big deal. He established himself as an A-lister with films such as Platoon, Wall Street and Young Guns on his resume. The future was bright for Charlie, he was wining! Marvel execs would want to cast an actor on the up, and at that time Sheen was a very bankable star. Sheen had something likable about him, he was all action and he has shown that he was more than apt at turning his hand to comedy. Sheen would have had the right level of charisma, to pull off a believable Steven Rodgers. He would also be able to bring a more serious quality to the role when it was required. Did I mention he was a big deal in the 80s.
Thor – Dolph Lundgren
Dolph Lundgren or to give you his full name Dolph "Thor" Lungdren was born to play the Agardian demi-god. During the 80s Dolph Lungdren was starting to make a name for himself. Appearing in Rocky IV, Masters of the Universe and Punisher. You just needed to take one look at Lungdren and you can understand why he is the only choice to play Thor. Lungdren looked more like Thor, than Thor looked like Thor. He had all the necessary attributes to play the Norse God of Thunder. A physical presence, blond hair and a broken English accent. It also helped that he was a believable tough guy and could probably give Hemsworth a good pasting.
Bruce Banner/ The Hulk – Bill Bixby/ Lou Ferrigno
The Incredible Hulk series ran from 1978 to 1982, and it was pretty decent. I can’t think of anyone that could do as good a job of playing Banner than Bixby. He really captured the lonely man story, trying to desperately find a cure to his curse. The series had a worldwide audience, and its popularity would help to create a pre-stablished Marvel universe. The audience would have a familiar connection going into the Avengers movie. Lou Ferrigno would still have to return as everyone’s favourite rage monster, the Hulk. He was perfect for the role, and you don’t get much bigger in physical stature than Mr Ferrigno, he was a real life hulk.
Nick Fury – Billy Dee Williams
Samuel Jackson is one cool guy, perhaps the coolest guy to be working in Hollywood right now. However Billy Dee Williams is the coolest guy in the galaxy. That alone would land him the role as the bad ass that is Nick Fury. The key ingredient for Williams becoming Nick Fury is that he possessed the only moustache capable of being a believable authority over the ego-centric Tony Stark, especially when you consider our Stark is played by Burt Reynolds. Billy Dee Williams, Nick Fury would have been far more contained, suave and charming than that of what we have seen from everyone’s favourite angry man, the brilliant Samuel Jackson. In addition, how awesome would Williams look with Fury’s trademark eye patch, whilst dodging bullets and lasers.
Black Widow – Sharon Stone
Sharon Stone was the ultimate femme-fatal of the 80s. She has an abundance of sex appeal and she could kick ass. These two attributes would be pre-requisites that an actress would need to attempt a believable portrayal of Natasha Romanoff aka Black Widow. Stone had the looks, and from her appearance in Total Recall she was more than capable of holding her own in a punch up. Stone had the ability to tap into her femininity as a shield to deflect from the suffering that she has caused others, something that Scarlett Johansson’s incarnation of Black Widow has achieved in the current run of Marvel movies. Snapping Stone would snap your neck with those perfectly sculptured thighs and would undoubtedly look great whilst doing it in the trademark Black Widow catsuit.
Hawkeye – Kevin Costner
Costner was in the dawn of his career. Towards the end of the 80s and at the start of the 90s Costner became a mega star. When you consider he made Dances with Wolves, Robin Hood Prince of Thieves, JFK and The Bodyguard in a two year period you can kind of get an idea of what a hit making machine Costner was. Although his star shone bright, it only shone for a short time, Costner would be the perfect choice to play everyone’s favourite, making up the numbers and relegated to very little screen time character in the franchise. Costner has shown he can take on a physical role and had demonstrated considerable archery ability with his take on an Americanised version of Robin Hood. However he may have to lose the mullet to be accepted as a member of the Avengers.
Vision – Matthew Modine
What can I say about Vision? He’s the Prince of the Marvel universe. Like the pint size pop icon, Vision has a similar fondness for the color purple. The problem with Vision’s character is that he seems to be totally devoid of any charisma or charm, he seems to lack any personality. I suppose that’s what you would get from a synthezoid. Literally any half decent actor could play the role of Vision. As someone has to play Vision I have elected for Matthew Modine to play the role. A man of undoubtable acting talent. I am sure that he could easily breeze through the entire movie with his eyes shut.
It would be interesting to hear other steemians take on an 80s Avengers cast. If you agree or disagree let me know below. If you liked this article, hulk smash that like button.
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