Good on ya for the absurdity misdirect. I've always thought these sorts of things or self deprecation will get you far in life, or at least deflect alot of bad stuff coming your way. How can they take you serious, if you're not serious?

I'm rather worried about your safety here. Forgetting all about your rock ammo in this situation is not a good thing. Though very realistic. I'm pretty sure if I saw a shapeshifter in my closet, it would be worse than seeing a shark in deep water away from the boat. Just kind of gulp away in the snorkel and hope the old ticker keeps on working long enough to get away. Bonking one of those things on the head with a stone would only make it mad, which might not be a good thing in an enclosed closet.