How Do You Behave? The Night Life Mentality Abroad - by chrisadventures
Imagine when you go out with your friends and someone just walks up to your group and stands at your table and starts having a conversation with your group? I believe at home in the Netherlands it's a bit weird to do so. We would wonder what this person would be up to. It's peculiar to see how people interact here during their Erasmus Exchange abroad in Valencia. I've been here, in Valencia, for 6 days now and I'll be staying five more months. I've met loads of people because everyone is outgoing and up to meet new people. It's the same as the backpackers atmosphere. Everyone is outgoing, but isn't it the way it should always be like?
Photo: backpackers play drinking games at Gili Backpackers Castle in Indonesia, the place I stayed last december
Yesterday I had an interesting conversation with someone about the student and travellers night life mentality here in Valencia. Everybody just introduces themselves to others and tries to connect and make friends. I believe it's one of the reasons why people go out.... to meet or hook up with people.
Most of us like to meet new people but I believe there still seems to be a sort of social barrier to actually do so. But once we all admit that we want to meet new people, I believe the situation would be a whole lot different. Everybody here behaves like they already know each other so there's actually no social barrier.
It's the same with travelling... once you're in a backpackers hostel, everybody wants to learn to know each other. But those same people in that backpackers hostel behave way differently to each other in their own countries because there's a less outgoing atmosphere.
But why?
It's the same people with the same behaviour and the same norms and values? Why would we be more social and outgoing in certain settings than in other situations? In this case, during my Erasmus Exchange, I believe that everyone simply knows we're in the same kind of situations. Everyone tries to make new friends and is less scared to approach others as they expect others to be open to it too.
Shouldn't we always behave like this?
It's up to you to decide, but I find it quite relaxing that everyone is so outgoing. There's no barrier at all and everyone starts having more fun with each other. I know that I find clubbing during travels and new situations more relaxing than when going out in the Netherlands. People are expecting you to come up to them and have fun. This post is mainly based on my opinion and I find it an interesting thing, I wonder what you guys think about this?
They try to connect because they want to get laid.
In my experience, identity to some extent is determined by your environment. They say that people who are brainwashed into being submissive, by methods of torture, quickly go back to being their old selves, once they get back to their homes and families. That's an extreme example, but the point is that, conversely, once your leave your home, you can become a new person.
That has positive and negative sides. Some people become more reckless, and others simply become more outgoing... Identity is definitely something to be careful with in that respect.
Thanks for posting and I bid you good journey.
culture and upbringing has some bearing on how people socialise and connect with others. You often find when people are on holiday, their normal barriers are relaxed and they will connect with others in the same location/hotel etc , but back in their own environment they will revert back to norm. Not everyone is like this, young people seem to connect with each other a lot quicker and keep the 'friendship' going when they return home due to social media. The number of 'new friends' my two girls have found when on holiday is quiet a few and they still keep in contact with some of them. Enjoy your exchange, I expect you will make some life time friends here...
Such openness and willingness to communicate maybe dangerous in some specific situations, but overall I really would like that people are more social. In my country it's not quite OK to just go and reach out to unknown people. Most likely people'll think you're drunk/crazy/rude... But sometimes it's OK for some people - so you never know it here.
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I think a key difference is that when people are in their home city, even if they're newcomers, they have at least some fixed outlets for meeting people through work, organizations, exercise, etc.
People who are away from their homes feel a bond with other people away from their homes--especially if they share a language in a place using a different language--and it doesn't just apply to nightlife. In addition, they have an urge to talk about their experiences, and it's hard to do that if you're struggling for basic words, so you may seek out other expats or travelers when you're new to a place, then develop friendships with locals as well as foreigners if you're in a place for awhile.
Surprise, even some of us old farts manage to continue new friendships using social media.
In small towns in the U.S. South when I was a girl, people nodded or waved or spoke even to strangers, and the Guatemala people here are the same. In all the Latin American countries I've been in, strangers will wish me a good appetite as they pass my restaurant table. Strangers don't generally do that in the U.S. The degree to which one talks to strangers and the amount of personal space one expects are both shaped by culture.