How Much Do You Want It?
This question is one I have come to be sure about lately as I go through the pressures of making the right decisions that would create a suitable path for me in life and in destiny. So many times I have considered quitting and maybe finding a 9 to 5 job that can pay me monthly salaries so I can take care of my basic needs and wants but then it dawns on me that most jobs that pay good salaries barely allows you time for self development. A job that pays you up to 500$ in my country would definitely leave you drained and most of the times nothing to invest in your dreams and this can be really frustrating because time definitely waits for no one. As a self employed creative who's already practicing, its often difficult to imagine that you no longer get to do what gives you life just so you could meet basic needs by working for a firm which in turn drains you and leaves with nothing for yourself.
I have heard friends who share similar dreams but at a point had to work for the same reasons complain bitterly out of job dissatisfaction and this further scares me about securing a job. I recently declined a micro-finance bank job not just because it would drain me but because I have a strong weakness for numbers and a banking institution would definitely expose this weakness more and subsequently bring about dissatisfaction in the said job. However, the problem of providing basic needs for myself still looms and I can only hope that sooner than later, I can start earning from my creativity and be able to provide these basic needs doing THE THINGS I ENJOY.
I spent the weekend with friends and colleagues who were my classmates back in my undergraduates who also share similar dreams in locations doing photo shoots and trying to shoot a viral video for my latest single, Olololo with little or no resources doing what we can and trying to make the most of what we have as creatively as we could. In all the stress and absence of required or adequate resources, there was no greater joy. We all had fun shooting all weekend at the beach and the streets of Lagos, Nigeria.
In these days of little beginnings which seem to have lasted for so long, I have come to realize that I have never WANTED anything in my life so MUCH. So much that I am willing to let go of any relationships that wouldn't inspire or motivate me towards achieving these dreams no matter how close or important the relationship in question is. I have lost friends who I cared about and honestly wouldn't mind losing more if it comes between me and the dream. One can only keep hoping and praying that the days of divine breakthrough come sooner.
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