The Most Difficult Indy Day

Every year for July 4th, I would go with my parents to visit relatives in northern Virginia. Last fall, my parents moved to be closer to family, so I made the trip by myself to go see everyone. Yesterday, I even went into Washington D.C. with my dad as he went in for his workday. Maybe I’ve changed or maybe my country has, but the holiday doesn’t have the same feeling that it used to.

Here I am, at the Lincoln Memorial, Washington, D.C.

In the morning, my dad and I drove to Harper’s Ferry, WV, to catch a train going into the city. I walked with my dad to his office in downtown D.C., then to coffee shop called Bakers and Baristas, where I had a breakfast sandwich and coffee. Walking through the streets, I passed different tourist shops, where I was startled by the amount of bright-red apparel with block white letters displaying an old campaign slogan.

I walked down to the White House, where a man I didn’t vote for (in an election with no great choices) is staying. There was extra security set up all over the city, so I couldn’t get very close to take the picture, and a police officer appeared out of nowhere to scope me out and ask me what I was doing.

Did he think I was a threat to the president? Honestly, I’m a he’s probably a bigger threat to me, since he has a penchant for disrespecting women. I don’t want my pussy grabbed today, thank you very much.

I kept walking, down to the end of the National Mall, where the Washington Monument, World War II Memorial, and Lincoln Memorial stand. These featured inscriptions to foster patriotism and pride. They were meant to foster respect for the people who served, both men and women.

I walked past the reflecting pools and into the park area where more memorials and monuments stand. I’ve been struggling with a sort of cognitive dissonance lately. It’s simple, really -- I’m proud of my country yet ashamed of the behaviors associated with it. I’m proud to come from a place where the founding fathers (including my great x7 grandfather Thomas Jefferson) fought and wrote their way to freedom and a new form of government, yet I’m ashamed of some of the things we’ve done with it. It took so long to end slavery, then to integrate all our states, and now we’re still dealing with systematic racism and police brutality. For a land that’s supposed to be free! It took so long for women to get the right to vote, to hold political office, and we still get paid less on average. For a land of supposed equal opportunity! Muslims are routinely profiled, threatened, and are facing an attempted travel ban. For a land sought out for religious freedom.

Washington Monument on left; WWII Memorial on right with Lincoln Memorial visible

I ate lunch at a restaurant called Sweetgreen near the Capitol building. I was surprised when I got to the register -- they didn’t take cash. I left my papery portraits of George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Alexander Hamilton in my pocket and pulled out my Visa bank card. I guess that tells you who our true leaders are.

It was a busy day, which I should have expected from Independence Day Eve in the U.S. Capitol. The National Mall, lined by the Smithsonian Museums, was buzzing with activity. The lines for the museums were outrageous (seriously -- lines to get into a museum you don’t even have to buy a ticket for?) and a festival was set up in the fields. The Capitol building sat atop the hill on the end of the Mall, empty of the congress members currently working on a bill that would probably kick me off of my health insurance. Because they need a paid vacation.

Capitol building, complete with construction and a stage out front

I had a nice respite from the politics, crowds, and “make America great again” hats when I went into the Folger Shakespeare Library. I wish I had been able to take photos, but my phone had died. They had an exhibit called “Painting Shakespeare” that featured paintings of scenes from his plays, along with information about the productions and the paintings themselves. I got lost in the images, remembering my favorite plotlines and quotations from different plays. They even had a First Folio on display, which is one of the original copies of most of Shakespeare’s plays. It may seem boring, but I love his works and they will always hold a special place in my heart.

Scholars debate whether the man William Shakespeare actually wrote all of those plays himself or if he plagiarised them. It’s another case where something I am proud to be a part of can get a little dampened by reality.

Washington Monument

I went back to Union Station to catch a train back to Harper’s Ferry, which is a little town where the Shenandoah and Potomac rivers meet. It was also the location of John Brown’s Rebellion, one of the major inciting incidents in the American Civil War. The town itself is built into a hill, like I’ve seen in European pictures, but never see in the U.S. The rivers formed a natural landscape that cut into the mountains.

Buildings in Harper's Ferry

It’s awe-inspiring to see something so beautiful and so natural. I find so much use in modern technology, driving my car, or convenient plastic packaging, but it’s because of these human inventions that these natural landscapes are so hard to find. I guess that’s another source of cognitive dissonance.

On Independence Day itself, July 4th, nothing went as planned. My relatives were scattered to the wind, with certain members feeling left out. It rained, so we didn’t light fireworks tonight. And my grandmother, the woman who means everything to the family and to whom family means everything, woke up with chest pains and went to the hospital in an ambulance. She was stabilized and kept there for observations, while we all wait and pray that she’ll be okay.

Graffiti in the train station

At the end of the day, I’m grateful to live where I do and to have a family I love. I wish I could write the same, happy-go-lucky stories I’ve written before about going into the city and having a fantastic day, but this hasn’t been that. I try to be a positive force in the world, but if any of you are inclined, I could use some positivity too, whether it’s through prayer, messages, or just good vibes. No matter what religion, we could use some prayer for the country and the people in it, for the leaders who make decisions that affect the whole world, and for my family as people who love each other. I know those will be my prayers tonight.

xo,

Cecilia