Wildlife rescue, so rewarding and so heartbreaking...
The phone rings, its 6 am. Another call-out to a kangaroo that's been hit by a car. Whoever hit it is nowhere to be seen, but i'm grateful they called it in. Most times people hit them and just drive off so this is a start.
Driving along in the dark, eyes peeled trying to see a brown lump on the side of the road, anywhere within 20ks.
We spot her and pull over, her legs are shattered the bones are sticking out, pelvis is shattered, She would never make it. Once a Kangaroo breaks its legs that's the end of their life, an unfix-able issue.
I can see the fear in her eyes, the pain. She's so scared, she's trying to drag herself away with just her front legs. its breaking my heart to watch her.
I put a blanket over her to try and calm her down, limit her sight and stress.
Now comes the call to the police, can you send someone out to put her out of her misery. "sure" they say, "someone will be there at some point". But when? it's not a priority for the police, but we're not legally allowed to shoot her. She could lay there for 2 hours waiting, or she could lay there for 2 weeks and they'll never come. Predators will come while she's still alive, unable to move, they might eat her alive.
Now comes the pouch check, glove on, hand in. Then you feel it, the small lump of a baby. barely as big as my fist, hairless. We pull her out slowly. Kangaroos have one tooth as a baby that helps them hook onto their mothers nipple. If you pull them off it the tooth breaks and the baby will be unable to feed, so carefully i take a small knife and cut off the nipple. The mother is in obvious distress, we're taking her baby away, she doesn't understand, shes crying and whining. Im crying.
We find a nearby farmer, he comes out with his gun and puts her out of her misery for us. The baby is bundled up and brought home. The next 3 days are crucial, if she makes it past then she has a much greater chance of survival.
She requires bottle feeding 6 times a day, she needs to be kept warm.
Its been 5 weeks! She seems to be doing so well, she's not scared, shes not crying nonstop, she's happy to be cuddled up in your jumper. Lets get her out and see if she can walk around yet, her fur is coming through and shes a little unsteady but she can walk all by herself!
But wait, something looks wrong, her left leg seems off, her balance is wrong.
Off to the vet, xrays, scans. She has rickets. It's not something you can fix, it means she will be in pain. It means she has to be put down.
This beautiful little baby, that we tried so hard to save, that made me smile, that made me feel like I was doing something. She tried so hard, she fought to be here, and now she has to be put down or live a life of agony in an unnatural way. If she was in the wild she would be left to die. And now we have to make that decision.
This is Dobby, Dobby is the Kangaroo from this story but it isn't uncommon, this happens once a week, just for us, just for kangaroos.
This job breaks my fucking heart, But I know I made mummas death much more peaceful, I promised her id look after her baby and I couldn't so it just feels like I let her down.
For every baby animal I save I probably see/help 10 die.
Can I even say i'm a rescuer? when most of the time i just feel like a fucking executioner....
Oh what a huge rotten feeling, what a sadness that is! Every time again experiencing the misery, going through that you have to deliver an animal from his / her suffering. I have such enormous respect for the people who do this. The people who are there for the animals! And I have such trouble with people who are the cause of this misery ... and do not care about it, no tear to drop.
I wish you a lot of strength now and in the future because unfortunately this never stops. You never get used to it, but remember that YOU are there for the animals. Even though it may not feel that way.
tears over my cheeks
It's a tough job for sure. I think ultimately you have to look at the good you do and not put the expectation on yourself that you can do any more than you can. Perhaps helping end their suffering is just part of the compassion that you are showing. What would have happened if you never went and tried to help in the first place? Personally I think that the fact that you're trying to help shows that you care and sometimes you are able to rehabilitate the animals that would have been lost if you did nothing. You gotta focus on the ones that you can help and be grateful for that! Much love bro.
yea im going to do a more positive post about it, I guess I wanted people to see that its not all fun and cute animals when I put up pictures. for me to be in the position to cuddle the baby wombat means so much pain and death had to occur. Im grateful that I get to do this, but it is hard. Sometimes I cry myself to sleep because of it, but at least I feel like im not just wasting my life.
you're a good man dizzle. dont see this is a failure, see it as sometimes we just cant change the outcome.
at least it had half a chance, and there was no suffer.
Glad to see a post from you bro, you had me worried after ur last post..
this article nearly made me cry, i can only imagine how hard this was to do, but doing the right thing is seldom easy.. unfortunately someone has to have the courage to do this incredibly hard task.. like u said, you can't let them suffer or be eaten alive, that would be so much worse!
Sometimes things don't make sense while you are doing them but down the road when u look back you realize how truly important they are. Sometimes love means taking away pain by any means necessary and i can tell by all your post you are filled with love regardless of all the bad shit that happens to u..
I wish there was an easier way but know u are doing good things even if sometimes it doesn't feel like it.. take care my friend.
Thank you brother. I was in a bad space then, I guess i still am but for now its ok.
I appreciate your comments on most of my posts, sorry I dont always reply.
This doesnt make me happy, But it does make me feel like im not just doing something because i have to, im doing it because I want to.
youve got my number. remember that. if ever you just need to talk, im only a phonecall ( or a 6 hr train ride if u need me to come down) away
This is really sad. I can't even imagine how awful it would be in either of these situations. But thank you for trying. You are not an executioner.
Animal stuff makes me cry so hard. Damnit. I'm a waterworks factory over here.
Thank you for taking this on. It's so difficult, I know.
i hear that. im a sympathetic crier. you got me going now dammit
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