3 Feet Above and 3 Feet Below

"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place, and I don’t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.

You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you it. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done.

Now, if you know what you’re worth, then go out and get what you’re worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him or her or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain’t you. You’re better than that! But until you start believing in yourself, you ain’t gonna have a life."

- Rocky Balboa

Life is beautiful but it's a constant struggle. Until there's no breath in our nostrils, it's going to stay that way. There's always going to be an event that's going to hunt you down unexpectedly and knock you off center. There's no such thing as "I've made it" stage. It's a myth. There will always be something waiting for you. Life will throw a whole bunch at you. It never runs out of bullets.

It's tough. Because we still have to move forward no matter what. We still have to put in the work to provide for ourselves and some of you, you have other mouths to feed on. But how do we proceed to do stuffs that can't be put at halt when you have no will power to do anything? When you just want to stay in your bed and do nothing..

It's a dilemma. But the good news is that we can still tackle in the midst of adversity and keep on doing things that are we are supposed to do. Although in the previous paragraphs, I called it life that hits us constantly, it's actually our interpretation, not the life event that puts us in pain and suffering. We cannot control what life throws at us, but we can definitely control what it means, and what we are going to do about it.

Again, it's how we see a life event that causes suffering, not what happens to us. It's our mind that we've created that kills us, not an external force. We've created, thus, we can destroy it.

So, we understand that it's our thoughts that kill us and put us in a sh*tty mood and make us worthless. But when you are heart is ripped apart and in total despair, knowing this is not enough to climb back. What we know in our head is never enough, if there is no action to back up our belief.

3 feet above and 3 feet below

Ok, this is the mantra. We narrow our scope and focus on attacking what's right in front of us. Even in our sh*ttiest moment we have a general grasp of what needs to be done. All we have to do is chop into tiny edible bits and eat it.

When you are running a 100 mile marathon, you are only thinking about the first 10 miles. The rest of 90 miles that you have to run is irrelevant at this point. Screw the 90 miles. Only the first 10 miles is what I'm shooting for.

Some of you might go, "But you have to conserve energy in the first ten, if you want to end up running the next 90 afterwards. Don't you have to have that in mind?" No, it's not the case. No matter how much will power and strength we've used previously, as the first tiny goal is attacked, we have enough to crush the next doable goal.

Many people who exercise on a regular basis probably experience this often times. There were numerous times when I felt like I could do only 20 ab crunches at max but end up doing 200 reps. I might have the intention to do 200 when I first lied down on the mat, but once the exercise begins I erase the thought of 200 reps, only the first 20. There's always that extra fuel tank that you can tap into after the first 20.

Currently, I have this girl who I really like and have hard time picking myself up because my mind is wobbling all over her. I'm losing my focus and whatever reaction that I get from her, it dictates my mood. I'm amazed how I feel this way after continuous relationship with different partners over 15 years, I thought I owned this.. I think I felt like this when I was in high school. It's freaking me out. But I got to get through it.

So, let me illustrate how I'm dealing with this situation. As always the case, I use the power of writing.

Step 1. Simple Listing

Normally, I would follow the protocol laid out in the post, How To Be 10X PRODUCTIVE (even when you have ADD), but right now, I don't have the will power to process something I could do in my normal days. So, I use the abridged version, starting from brainstorming. Like I said previously, even in our sh*ttiest moments, we have a general grasp of what needs to be done. Write that down.

Step 2. Jot down the rules

Again, it's imperative to note that tasks on your today's to-do list need to be chopped into tiny bits. When your mind is not at a normal state, it's hard to adhere to these crucial rules because your mind is trapped on something else. So, your goal is to write these as well and keep reminding yourself with them.

"3 feet above and below" mantra is the most important rule. Along with this axiom, what goes hand in hand is going strong when you start to notice that you are fading. Say you have a task to complete in your to-do list, and you are only hitting the 30% mark from completion and you see yourself fading. What do you do? Since you feel like you are never going to complete, do you just let go? No, you go strong. Tell yourself, "Since I'm going to give up very soon, I'm going to squeeze this last single droplet. I'm going to own this moment." The game you are playing is not completion but going strong and attacking it at the current moment. It's ok to leave it unfinished if we get tired later. We can always pick it up. Ironically, this will keep you going and have a task completed.

Step 3. Chopping into tiny beats

Let's put "3 feet above and below" into play. Pick a task from your to-do list and let's start dissecting it. The process is simple. We need to dumb things down and just break it into baby parts. Once we have edible pieces laid out, set the order so that you know in what sequence you'll be attacking. Again, don't get overwhelmed by the idea of completion, it's ok to stop at sequence #2.

Final Words

They say the growth begins when you start to push yourself when you are most reluctant to do anything. You might feel useless, hopeless, and scared. You might feel like all the monkeys are hanging onto your shoulder and dragging you down and no longer can move forward. But it's ok. It's really ok. You can always make a decision to push yourself forward regardless of your feelings.

The drill in the post is not as easy as lying down on bed and doing nothing. It requires a push. But it's doable.

Just don't forget about the "3 feet above and 3 feet below" mantra. You just need to inch yourself forward. You'll start to see yourself doing stuff even though you don't feel like doing anything. Then, your confidence grows. And in no time, you'll be back on your track.

On to the next one.