Don't Lose The People In Your Life While You Focus on Those that Have Left

People come in and out of our lives throughout our life journey, and most times, we get close to these people, build meaningful relationships and create beautiful moments together. They become a part of our lives and once they are no more, we get hurt and are tempted to hold onto them (which we most times do). Most times, it is as if our whole world crashes when these people leave. Life without them seems like a death sentence!

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Some of these people who were once a part of our lives made the choice to leave (willingly), while some of them didn't have the opportunity of making that choice for themselves. And for some, that was the only choice they had at that point. But whatever the reason may be, they are no more a part of our life, and life has to go on (with the people that are now part of it)

I know, it hurts really badly. It is hard to live without them because they have over time become a part of your life, we have become attached to them and life without them just seems incomplete. But we can't keep focusing on those that have left, we may end up losing those that have stayed (and care about us)

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Yes, you've had beautiful memories with them together, they have helped you grow at some point, they have contributed to your happiness (in the past) etc. But as hard as it is to admit, they are no more a part of it and we can't stop living because of that. Easier said than done, yeah? But we need to put an effort into doing that. We need to understand that people will come in and out of our lives, and that's just how life is.

For When They Made The Choice To Leave

Whether they willingly made that choice to leave or not, they made the choice to leave and it's not because you are not good enough (so, don't let it shatter you) and leaving doesn't make them bad either (so, you don't have to hate them for leaving).

You don't have to forget that they ever existed (because that is nearly impossible), your thoughts about them doesn't have to be one full of resentment (if they have hurt you badly, slowly learn to forgive them).

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Learn to accept the fact that they are no more a part of your life (maybe they will come back someday, but focusing on them won't bring them back it might only break you the more), open your heart to receiving the love and care that people that are still in your life want to offer you.

With time, you will heal and be ready to live life fully again. Who knows, maybe they would have hurt more if they stayed back. Find closure, and let yourself enjoy life with the amazing people that are still in your life.

For When They Didn't Make That Choice

I once watched this movie of a woman who had lost a son. This woman actually had two sons (one was 9years and the other 4years), she travelled out of town and left the younger child in the care of the older one (well, they had a nanny too). And somehow when they were out playing, the younger one fell off a cliff and died (while the older was kind of distracted).

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The mother came back and blamed it all on her other son and pushed him away, she had forgotten that the other child had also lost a brother whom he loved dearly and needed to be comforted. With each day that passes by, he will come to his Mum and ask her to forgive him for not paying close attention to his brother but she will shut him out. He tried all he could,, but she never paid any attention to him.

Well, he got tired (he is human after all), he got rebellious and became a man of himself at a tender age (he had to protect himself). And after the mother was done mourning (more than 10years later), her "son" wasn't there anymore, and well, she needed him, but she has lost him...

Yes, losing a loved one to the cold hands of death can be really unbearable but don't forget that there are people around you that want to comfort you and be a part of your healing process, you don't need to push them away (I nearly made that mistake).

Again, I am not saying that you should forget that these people ever existed, or delete every memory that you have of them. All I am saying is that you should give the people that are present in your life a chance to help you heal from those pains.

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Give yourself the opportunity to exciting stuffs again, to meet exciting people and creat beautiful memories again. Don't lose what you have while you chase after what you have already lost.

Cherish the memories you have with them, but don't let it hold you back from living and loving again. Live every moment you have with the people that are still here.

Appreciate the people that are still here, don't take them for granted, you might wake up one day and realize that they are no more. Life is too beautiful to be wasted holding onto people that have left.

Much Love, Audrey

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