🙌The Joy Of Giving Unconditionally🙌

in life •  last year 


I have come to a point in my life that I can give unconditionally.

And it is a blessing.

I experience such joy in giving something to someone else without wanting anything back.

The joy lies in the unconditionality of it.

I really really really do not expect anything back.

It’s a massive relief and change from the scarcity mindset that I used to have.

There is no joy in being stingy

I really started noticing it in my relationship with my beloved.

With him, everything that I own he is completely free to use as well without even having to ask me.

And I experience so much happiness when I cook something he really enjoys or I buy him something that he really loves.

This REALLY was not the case in my past relationships.

I can remember feeling very irritated if my ex even used MY favourite cup.

I had the scarcity mindset embedded into my WHOLE being. Which manifested in being irrationally irritated and having angry thoughts in my head.

It's not a very loving space to be in I can tell you!

But as I meandered through life and became a little wiser and older, this started to change.

I was slowly moving from a lack mindset to a space of abundance.

And with that comes a hell of a lot.

In abundance, there is no lack.

In abundance, the undercurrent is ALWAYS LOVE.

Life became infused with love.

I know this sounds a little out there but really it is not.

I was attracting way more positive experiences and only good-hearted people came into my life.

This used to be the opposite in the past

It was then that I started diving deep into meditation and discovered the Pali word Dāna.

The practice of generous giving.

The practice of giving from the heart

When one gives unconditionally, that is Dāna.

But how does this ancient word translate into real world 2018 daily life?

It is simple.

There are three so-called levels.



You give something but there is no joy in giving it. You feel irritated by even the idea of giving it and would rather not give it.


You experience a little joy in giving it but you do expect something back from giving this. Some thought goes into the actual giving but there are always conditions that you hold onto. And if these conditions don`t get satisfied, you will feel negative feelings.


There is SO much joy in the giving process from start to finish. And there is no expectation from that person whatsoever. The joy is in the giving.

So how does this translate into real life?

Imagine you are going to give a gift to someone.

Giving something you have lying around and don’t much thought to it. And in the process of giving it to the person, you don’t put effort to wrap it and give the present in a haphazardly way. No energy or attention goes into it at all.

You think of the things this person has done for you and what they have given you as a present and based on that you choose something that is appropriate. By giving this to that person, you expect them to give you a present when the time comes. A little effort and attention goes into the giving process.

You feel joy from the start. You think and feel quite a bit about what you are going to buy. When you buy it, there is joy in the process of handing money over to the cashier. Attention, effort and detail go into the packaging of the present. When you give the present, there is a lot of joy within you and to watch the person unfold. And you do not expect anything back. Not even a thank you.

In unconditional giving is where true joy and freedom lie.

When you can give something without expecting anything in return, happiness is natural.

And what it all boils down to is intention.

What is the intention behind it all?

And this is what I ask myself whenever I buy something or I am giving away.

If it is poorly or conditional, then I will not do it.

If I am struggling with parting with my money or I feel resistance to it, I will drop it and question my intentions and try to find the root.

Why am I feeling like this?
Why am I feeling like I will be lacking in this something if I purchase this?
What is my intention?

And it really works to practice this and it moves me more and more into unconditional giving.

Which in turn makes me a happier human being.

How do you give? Do you enjoy the whole process? Do you expect something in return?

I’d love to know!

Here’s to finding joy in unconditional giving.

Photo was taken when I was living in India and I did a bit of voluntary work at a home for disabled children. This is Selvi, still one of the most amazing little human beings I have ever come across. She is in my heart forever. This was one of the first moments I realized how joyful the act of giving is!

BIG love,



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I've worked with @ashleykalila on the @humansofsteemit for some time now and I can absolutely say she is one of the most generous Steemian I've ever had the pleasure of knowing.

Oh @deadsparrow, you are so kind!!!


@humansofsteemit wouldn't be where it is now without you!!

I like the honesty in the write up. Thanking you for sharing, I have learnt a lot from reading it.

Keep up the good work, I can tell you I felt the impact and so many others do too.

Thanks sweety!

You are welcome

The act of giving in this way is a gift in itself both for the giver and the recepient - it's so life-giving!

That photo radiates joy, I fell in love with it immediately.

Thank you Lovey!

This is one of my most favourite photos of myself :)

Great ideas and very accurate thoughts from my friend. I agree with you . I like the writing very much.
congratulations I will follow you :)

Thank you dear!

I whole-heartedly agree with you here @asheleykalila.

I believe that the tiny, unseen forces are often the biggest, brightest things when we give energy to them.

Giving without expecting anything in return is very much one of those unseen forces that, time after time, has not only gifted me with an immediate sense of joy, but also it has supported me along my journey, especially when I needed the help or support.

When we realize this simple fact: there is more than enough for everyone than we can operate just as you have stated here.

It's so much more enjoyable to operate this way, and I love it that I have found a platform (Steemit) that operates off of this exact principle.

Loving this post @ashleykalila! Thank you so much for sharing!


Abundance is all around and everywhere!!

Yes, it is wonderful to give from a full heart of love, than doing things with a hard heart. Sometimes love doesn't come always easy. Sometimes love is a choice. And hopefully in choosing to not only love our friends and the less fortunate, but also choosing to love our enemies and the difficult people in our lives we can choose to love freely. Without condition!

I hope you have a wonderful day. Thanks for sharing. :)


Thank you for sharing this post. It was a joy for me reading it, and makes my day brighter. Just to see that it exists ... this unconditional love!


It sounds like you have found a nice stage to be at in your life. I give unconditionally to my kids, sometimes to my man... Not always but often. I think your three levels are a great way to express it the stages of giving.


It is a constant practice!

Amazing blog! You truly have hit the nail on the head here! #steemsugars

That is a levely post @ashleykalila Thank you for sharing.Thumbs_Up.gif

This made me smile.


Posts that can awaken many people. Today, especially in the big cities, the social life is fading away. They only think about themselves without caring for others (you are you, my fund is me). There is a philosophy that is taught in religion or belief that we profess, the more we share, then our property is not reduced at all, will get blessings and growing. Thank you for reminding me that sometimes forgot @ashleykalila.


Thank you and greetings @ashleykalila.

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Good luck my friend

Resteemed @lovecuration