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RE: The eternal heartache of a distant dad
Honestly, as someone who has experienced this but the other way around, this post touched my heart.
My father lives a 10 minute walk away from my house yet we do not have contact.
To read this post and to read such genuine heartfelt raw honesty makes me happy.
It gives me hope.
Because I've been so jaded about fathers (and men in general) that it really does a world of good to see a dad be so caring and loving about his daughter.
Really Ash, thank you for your words.
And regarding the situation, you need to do what feels right for you.
Please keep us updated on your journey dear!
x
Mine is the opposite to yours, yet we are all linked. It's funny, as i wrote my comment below before i read your comment. Mine is hope that my daughter will talk to me.
Now i feel if i keep messaging her i feel like a stalker. So now i just message on her birthday and Christmas. It's so sad.
Ah, it's difficult isn't it?
How long has it been since you last saw each other?
I wanted to write : Don't give up!
But I realized that's me projecting my own hope onto your story because I seriously wish my father would make the effort to make contact in a healthy normal way.
So my advice to you is this : Do what you are comfortable and happy with!
Whether that is messaging her only at Christmas and her birthday, or not messaging at all or just really going all in and making a ton of effort to connect with her.
<3
x
Thanks for your reply. I'm toying with the idea of writing mu daughter another message. However the pain it causes when the message goes unread keeps me a prisoner of my own making.
I've changed so much. I haven't seen her, or heard from them for 3 and a half years.
I sent a new year message and i don't think she even read it!! I can't blame her.
I will hopefully build up the confidence to try again soon. Thank you for your kind thoughts...
Thank you Ashley, It means a lot to have someone speak from 'the other side', even if the situation there doesn't sound ideal.
Speaking personally, the amount of time spent thinking about how my daughter is, has far outweighed anything else, since the day she arrived, and I suspect that is not as uncommon as it may seem.
We're (ok, some men) are just a bit crap about talking about it - I'm very much in this gang.
I'll likely write a blog, and include some pictures, about the time we have together over the weekend.
Thank you very much for your words too x
<3
Yes.
Enjoy the process, the journey and everything in between.
And above all, be kind to yourself and stick to your heartcenteredness!
<3
You've offered such good advice @ashleykalila. I have really appreciated reading your perspective ❤