Choices

in life •  last year 

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Often I look back at my life choices and smile to myself. There are many I would most probably not make… on the other hand there were times when I was too scared and confused to make a choice when I should.  


I smile because I am happy with where I am now. I am happy with who I have become. I know that if I made other choices I would be somewhere else and feel something completely different. But that’s not how things turned out…

 
The tricky things is… we don’t always realize that we are making a choice when we do. Sometimes it seems like yet another ordinary day, like it’s yet another everyday decision, like it’s one more small and unimportant choice. But then… looking back we realize that the unimportant choice redirected us to very important place. 


Have I made mistakes? 

Of course… Many of them. Emotional, eccentric and creative person cannot always be right. Most of my choices have been impulsive… but that’s who I am. 


There were many years when I carried my regrets with me everywhere I went. I had this heavy luggage of regrets related to the choices that led me to unpleasant places. Not anymore… I’ve thrown them all out. One by one they have been kicked out of my life. Because if I did not know what ugly places feel like I would not appreciate the place I am at now. 


Making choices can be tough. You have 50% probability to make the right one… the rest is the probability that you’ll make the wrong one.  


Ironically enough, the probabilities are equal.  


Only looking back you will know which one you made… was it wrong or right. But when you are looking straight in the eyes of the choice you have no clue… not only you,.. no one has a clue… 


But you know what? 

There is something much worse than making the wrong choice. Not having the choice at all.    

That is the ugliest place to be… 

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Agreed, I'm just now starting to make decisions on my own behalf which adhere to my philosophy which is emerging based on who I am which is a reflection of my values. I spent a chunk of time asking myself what's important to ME and since then my decisions became easier and I could see that my previous choices were largely for someone else.

good for you! thanks for dropping by