One day, a married man found out his wife was having an affair. They divorced.

He proceeded to become SUPER FUCKING AWESOME!

He drank beer for breakfast.

He farted anytime he wanted.

He left the toilet seat up.

He met the boys anytime he wanted to go bowling and shit.

He ate Doritos at home and nobody nagged at him for spilling crumbs all over the carpet.

He adopted a super cute cat his bitch ex-wife had a phobia of.

He proceeded to quit his shitty job to really do what he wants, which is to venture into this own business.

He made a ton of money and saved so much.

He bought cool toys, video games, more beer, a powerful PC and laptop, more beer and even his own place!

He walked around naked all he liked then.

He rested comfortably at home knowing that he doesn’t ever have to attend pretentious dinner parties again.

He slept in everyday.

He dated a ton of beautiful women.

And he lived happily ever after.

Amen. 

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