Bullying sucks.

Bullies are toxic.

They’re a plague upon the land as they wreck the lives of victims. It’s sad, but it exists everywhere, be it in the workplace, school or home. Victims are either young or old.

One of the biggest factors I personally think is allowing bullying to exist is the ease of the passerby.

The passerby is neither bully nor victim, albeit they try their best to be good people and help the victim.

But alas, they cannot fully empathize.

As they attempt to help, they end up saying insensitive things that aggravates the entire situation:

“Oh you need to chill out.”

“Relax dude.”

“This is not a big deal man.”

“You’re so petty.”

“You should let it go because others can.”

“Oh they’re just like that.”

And so forth.

What results from this?

The victim doesn’t feel any better or worse, has been forced to repress their feelings.

The bully gets away with it, perhaps at most with a slap on the wrist.

The bullying will then continue to go full circle and repeat itself because, as with most surroundings, victim, bully and passerby still interact with one another.

The plague continues to spill over.

No, one cannot simply chill out. There needs to be a discussion for this.

No, one cannot simply relax. If someone is truly hurt, it needs to be explored deeply.

No, it is a big deal to the victim.

No, petty is a judgement you make because you choose to not understand the situation or how the victim feels.

No, one can’t let it go like others because one is not like others.

No, being born to act a certain way doesn’t give anyone the right to hurt others.

There’s a complete lack of sensitivity, something which the victim strongly desires.

As harsh as it sounds, the truth is, the passerby needs to learn how to treat a victim right.

The truth is that your good intentions are not enough.

If we want to tackle bullying, let’s all of us work together for it, bully, victim and passerby included.