Hold up! You're approaching dating totally WRONG!

in #life7 years ago (edited)

I was introduced to this girl a long time ago by a friend.

I thought she was pretty cute yeah. She was also into me.

We went out like once.

I was interested in her, but not THAT interested.

That was pretty much the end of it.

To cut a long story short, she was a little unhappy about the way things turned out. She knew I was talking to other girls.

She literally told me at one point, "If you're after a girl, you need to actually show that you're interested."


And in my mind I was like, "But I wasn't even that interested in you in the first place!"

That folks, is how you need to approach dating: You act according to whatever you feel and what you are!


If you're single, you have every right to show that you're single

Time and time again, I'd see my guy friends get extremely stressed out over some girl they were interested in. 

They overanalyzed everything and kept thinking that they 'should' act a certain way to show that they'd make a good, potential boyfriend for that girl.

They'd tell me shit like, "I can't flirt with other girls! Otherwise, she'd think I am not a loyal person!"

I honestly think that's a crock of bullshit.

If you're not with officially a couple with this person yet, you don't owe them ANYTHING.

If you're not exclusive yet, you are ALLOWED to see others!

If you're single, you free as fuck to flirt with any god damn body you want.

This is to protect you!


Again, you don't owe them anything. Why are you depriving yourself of your own rights just because you like someone?

Why do you act like you need and should do certain things when you barely even know them?

Why should you not meet others? You are not their slave!

Why do you act like you need to do all the work when it takes two hands to clap?

Of course, if you're totally fallen for that person and want to spend your life with him or her...


By all means, do what you think is right and do your best to win them over in the most honest, possible way.

But remember, you need to be honest with yourself too. You should be yourself and act like who you really are. 


"But hey man! If I don't show them that I can be trusted, no one would want to date me!"


You're probably thinking this. Fair enough. To act like a playboy doesn't exactly build trust or give them a sense of security.

But ultimately, that's them judging you. That's their insecurities speaking because they got hurt before. That's them refusing to believe that you're a good person. 

That's them not giving a flying fuck about who you really are.

Why do you want to date such people then?

Trust me. Have some faith and be a little patient. The right one will come along, and he or she would be taken in entirely for who you are from the get go. 

And you'd willingly change for them. 

I did. 

I've met many amazing girls who actually understood my point of view and never once judged me. I could be myself with them and talk to them about anything and not be afraid of offending them. 

Then with proper and effective communication, we let our romance bloom.

You deserve only the same awesomeness.

Follow me on Steemit here! @aldentan

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Thanks for sharing.

If you have some interest in photography then please have a look at my profile.

nice story

welcome dear

Love and know yourself first, be honest, avoid pedestals. Don't fall in love with anyone you can't be friends with. Great article. Glad it had a happy ending.

People can cause so much drama.. but here is the future: robots. They cannot love you, but they can kill you! Take a look at robots of the future at Boston Dynamics, a DARPA funded company.

Check here some insane robot videos: https://steemit.com/future/@clahan/robotic-future-videos

hahahahahah.. in next pic. girl slaps man on his face and man put finger in middle ;)

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