I intend to return to steemit soon

in #lgbt5 years ago

I'm only giving a few details here because I don't have time to write the longer post until later.

Anyway, I have some stuff to write about a recent major life change I've experienced that I don't think people on steemit are aware of for the most part.

Hell, I'm not even sure how many people really remember me all that much here or still follows my blog - but I figured I have this account already setup and was looking for somewhere to post some detailed thoughts and feelings about my recent life event that may or may not be of interest to people here.

That said, it'd be nice to change my username here - is that possible now? It wouldn't be too hard with a hardfork to allow it, but I can work with this username.

Let's get to the point then.

It's pride month for those who don't know - basically June is a month used by the LGBT community to organise pride events - gay pride marches etc. I figured that before the end of the month it'd make sense to make this post that's been on my mind for a while.

I'm transgender. I came out to my family and friends and most of my online acquintances last August and began hormones last September.

I've legally changed my name (I'm now Mrs Gwen Nelson) and live full time as a woman and I'm seeing a psychiatrist next month.

Anyone following me on social media or who otherwise knows me outside steemit has known all of this since I came out, but I never came out to the community on steemit including my old colleagues from when I worked briefly as a developer here (no hard feelings guys if you're reading).

I caused a bit of drama when I was fired from steemit, for which I'd like to offer my most sincere apologies - to @sneak especially, you're a cool guy and I'm sorry for having let you down and behaving in such an unprofessional manner. My apologies also go out to all of my former colleagues and I hope you will still welcome me as a regular user. I may or may not have some ideas and insight for steemit's technical roadmap that I will share in due course.

Overall though, expect the main theme of this blog to become of a rather personal nature when not discussing gender issues in general.

Of course I'll still post articles on other subjects that may be of interest, but my primary motive in returning was to use steemit as an outlet for documenting my experience, thoughts and feelings on my journey towards becoming my true self.

Lastly, a word of caution: I strongly believe in free speech and in education of the ignorant rather than censorship. There is a lot of ignorance and sadly outright prejudice and bigotry aimed at trans people and another motive for blogging about my experience is to try and inform and educate and hopefully reach some of these people...... But I expect that sadly a blog focusing on trans issues (or LGBT in general) is likely to draw people who are not simply ignorant but downright malicious or those who are simply immature trolls.

If someone appears merely ignorant in comments on my posts I will attempt to educate, if they're trolling I may respond for the benefit of third parties reading or I may simply ignore them.

But suffice to say, I expect at least some ugliness.

I also would not be surprised to find some of my followers have ignorant views - I would hope not, but they are widespread. As such it's likely some of you will view me in a different light or be offended by what I say, perhaps by my very existence. To such people I ask you to keep on reading if you can, you may learn something - but I also ask that if anything I post offends you that you simply stop reading.

We all have free speech, let's use it in a mature and wise fashion.

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On behalf of the Steemit team, welcome back Gwen!

Thank you, feels good to be back - I'm still very much a strong believer in the steemit platform and the good it can do for free speech

I got your email; thank you for the kind words.

Best of luck to you in your new life.

I literally just composed a second saying I found out you're no longer at Steemit - feel free to ignore it, it's nothing important like the first.

And thank you, so far it's been nothing short of a miracle for my mental health, so I'm doing well.

This takes so much courage! Cheers to you Gwen!

People always tell me I'm brave, but honestly I feel like the closet was far more terrifying - as was the mental image of being a man forever, and worse getting more and more masculine and further away from who I am inside with each passing year.

I'm glad I caught it in time and managed to kick my denial before it was too late, though I still mourn the years I lost to denial. That whole subject (the intense regret many trans people including myself feel) might make good material for a post, so thanks for the inspiration!

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