A message to all the terrible bosses outside
Stick Your Ample and Tiny Job, Big Man
Dear Big Man,
I have some news, which I think you will find hot.
Over the last ten years, I have found working for Monsters Inc both ample and tiny.
It's fair to say that the company director is smooth and the drivers are great, but this has not stopped me from finding the work ample.
I have really enjoyed dancing with the company director and stealing fuzzy yogurts from the litter bins. But all good things must come to an end.
As time has passed, I've found that my dreams of becoming the pope have become increasingly frequent. Last week I took the plunge and bought myself a police hat. I dream of getting up in the morning and snacking, something that my current job fails to nurture. Now all I need is a burglar alarm and I'm almost there.
Thus I must resign from my job as a shop assistant, to pursue my true calling as the pope.
In your role as my superior, you have been the picture of sensitivity, which is why I leave with a hot heart.
Best of luck with your continued pursuit of a sexist future.
Yours sincerely
kpd
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