1월 영어 공부

1월 선방했습니다.
2월도 열심히 할 수 있기를.

오늘 영어 듣기 하다가 잼있는 부분 있어서 유투브 자동생성 스크립트 퍼옵니다.

에밀리(셋째), 헬렌(둘째), 수잔(첫째) 세 딸을 둔 강연자 낸시의 짤막한 가족 에피소드 공개입니다. 정신건강에 관한 강연에서 정신화(mentalization, 자기중심적 시각에서 벗어나 타인의 사고나 감정을 고려하여 반응할 수 있는 능력)를 언급하면서 이 에피소드가 나오는데, 처음 들을 땐 웃을 수 없었고, 스크립트 한 번 보고 다시 들었을 때 비로소 웃을 수 있었습니다. 정신화라고 하는 발달 과정에서의 인지적.정서적 성취를 세 딸이 이뤄가는 모습을 보면서 엄마 낸시는 딸들이 사랑스럽기도 하고 웃기기도 했을 것 같아요. 10살, 우리나이로는 초4 정도까지도 아빠랑 결혼할 수 있다고 믿는 자기중심성에서 벗어나지 못 하는 것 같습니다. ㅎㅎ

If you think about what a child has achieved if they are capable of imagining that their parents have a relationship with each other that's not about them about which they can feel envious and have fantasies. That's a victory over the two-year-olds egocentrism where everything is about me somehow. That's a movement into the capacity to mentalize the separate existence of other people a separate motives of other people and that's what's important about that phase and in healthy development it starts happening around three years old.

A family story occurs to me I was sitting with my two daughters when they were seven and ten and my two and a half year old nice it was pushing three at the time and she announced to the the other three of us 'when I grow up I'm going to marry my daddy' and my younger daughter who was seven at the time it is an empath and she said to her Emily 'I know just how you feel because when I was your age I wanted to marry my daddy too.' Emily it was very smart she got that there was an implicit no. In this and she said 'but I'm going to marry my dad' and Helen's got this big you know compassionate eyes and said 'I'm very sorry to tell you this Emily but there's a rule against that there's a rule against marrying anybody in your own family' and Emily thinks about this for a minute and then she says 'my mommy and my daddy are in the same family and they're married in general' then my seven-year-old turns to my ten-year-old and those like and my ten-year-old says to Emily or says to me 'Mom you remember when I was a <?> I used to say when I grow up I'm going to marry daddy' and I say 'yeah I remember when you used to say that.' I think cyclist children I'll say that. I've got sure what other people um she's again then 'you used to say I'm sorry Susan you can't marry him because I'm already married to him' that's what yeah I remember it saying that to you' and she said 'and then I would say to you that's all right you'll be dead.' That's a developmental achievement.