"KILL THE PAD" CHALLENGE! WEEK #2 Hosted by @Jamesgetsit/Theme:Steem: Communicate to Connect

in #killthepad7 years ago (edited)

Artwork by @scuzzy


Welcome to Ones Perspective!




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Hi Ya! Wonderful Steemians! This is my submission to the #kill-the-pad-challenge.
The Theme: Steem!!
So a little back story on my piece so you better get where one is coming from.
I know that the subject is Steem.
I just can not help putting something truthful in there with it.
As I am sure if you are not the government or connect to any, I do not know how to lie to ya anymore!!
This is speaking on what ones need to do to better get upvotes from influencers from a post I read on Steemit. The growth of Steem. That we all need to do our part to communicate with each other, and I threw a little Final Fantasy in there.(Don't ask me why haha!!)



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Verse:Communicate to Connect

Alright spectacular Steemians get in tune to tha beat.
Snap your fingers and tap your feet,
First three four minutes, I need that powered up money upvote.
Hot this hip-hop section.
Got to go number One, Trending.
I'm lookin' to share lessons with with the world, learned.
Experimented and implemented.
Strong growth gots Steemit busily buzzing,
Super always centered between left and right images.
Communicate with this community.
Comment great content, not for tha money justly.
Do it for a connection to a grand adventure,
Advent children hear the Steem roar,
From my lungs till your hearts throbbing for more.
Then we can truly free this earth.
As we continue steeming through tha bullshit,
Looking for peace and envisioning a true place to call home.


Thank you for joining one in this journey!! Oh P.S. I don't really know how many bars this is!!! haha!

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Yooo, sorry it took a minute to review it... Busy days.

Alright, so yea man. You said you didn't know how many bars it is, and that is sort of a problem.

When you write a rap, you need to be thinking of it in terms of bars. Rap isn't just poetry spoken over some music. In order to flow, you have to understand when a bar is ending. Once you have this knowledge, you can do what you want over the beat.

Tap your fingers to the beat of an instrumental, 4 beats is 1 bar of music. With rap, 2 of those bars equal one of our bars. So that'd be 8 beats to our rap bar.

To help with it, you can hit your rhyme words on the snare. GENERALLY there is 2 snares per bar in most hip hop instrumentals. Practice with that and you will greatly increase your knowledge with writing raps.

Also, this sounds stupid, but it does help, you could pick some of your favorite rappers, get their lyrics and just rap along with them. Then find another instrumental that is similar, and rap to it. This will help you identify bars and flow a lot more. It's great practice.

Having said that, I thought the content was very cool, but there was no real rhyme scheme or structure to me. I think once you practice with bars and putting bars to a beat, you could write some dopppeee raps.

Right on!!!! Thanks a lot. Yea okay I get what a bar is I am just not well equipped at writing them out.

So one bar has two rhyme words and two lines is one rap bar if I got that correct.

I will definitely be working on this and much much more!! Thank you for the critique, it is the only way to get any better is to learn what is needed!!

No, not exactly... One bar doesn't have to have 2 rhyme words, you can have only a single rhyme in it.

So in this sentence, is a single bar, single line /
We share a single earth, single star, single mind /

That's 2 bars. There is a pause at the end of the first bar signified by the "/"... Then pickup the second bar when a new bar comes in the beat.

And I totally agree, gotta be open to critiques and criticism for sure, only way to grow.

Okay I see how that goes, I will attempt to do this for the next @termitemusic, I already have it written, just have to find the bars.!!!

Actually real quick if ya have the space.. Here are a couple lines I have, just to give me an idea with my own words how would you write these out.

Floating in a blackberry dream,
Feeling kush when I hit tha scene,
Bright, I be lighting up the screen,
No machine anti spirit human zombie,
controllin' me.

Floating in a blackberry dream, feeling kush when I hit tha scene /
Bright, I be lighting up the screen, Can't you see I'm no machine /
anti spirit human zombie, controllin' me.

Obviously there will be another bar needed after that next one. You could also do it the way you were doing it, would be a slower flow, and could possibly have a decent amount of space left open. This works on some instrumentals, but some it doesn't. All depends on the BPM and style of instrumental, at least to me.

Okay!! Cool yea okay I see what you are saying on how to write the words out..
Really thanks this I think will help greatly more to my presentation then writing, not sure if I will switch that.

At least now I will be able to see the bars in the lines better. Until I master all that has to do with this!!

No prob man, if you ever wanna run anything by me or ask me another question or anything dude, just hit me up on discord.

Will do for sure!!

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Most excellent my man, well done , i love the verse, poetry great stuff, i will follow you now as if you did not know i love poetry and music of course.

be well

@redsfallin

Thanks I appreciate that, I have seen one or two of your things. was going through some things, just now getting back to figuring this all out so I can not have to slave away at something I really don't want to do.

Its fun steem on

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